That's one of the reasons a Federal Gov't job is appealing to us. There seems to be a lot more flexibility in the public sector in terms of telecommuting, part time work etc. than in the private sector.
Can you move to a less expensive area and commute?
Moving way out into the suburbs isn't appealing for several reasons: 1) the length of the commute (especially in the DC area) can become extreme. I know people who live practically in W. Virginia and commute to DC area. They spend something like 3 hours a day in their car; 2) suburbia isn't that appealing to us. We prefer living in closer to the city, with its nightlife, culture, restaurants etc.
We'll eventually find a solution, but at this point we're not willing to change our lifestyle in order to have kids.
MM wrote “We prefer living in closer to the city, with its nightlife, culture, restaurants etc.”
Well, since we have 4 kids, I think I have the key to your concerns. A family with 4 kids does not need to worry about living in a neighborhood with “nightlife, culture, restaurants etc.”!
Brookland. That's where I'd go if I were 30 again and looking. We ended up on Capitol Hill but the Hill was cheap then. Neighborhoods change. Brookland is still affordable but it's gonna go gangbusters.
I also know some people (white, middle class) who have moved to Anacostia. (Anacostia is not an exotic "over there somewhere" location to those of us on the Hill.) There are some very nice areas, underpriced because of the name.
Drive Westover some time. Go out PA Avenue, cross the river, and it's the last right turn before you hit Branch Avenue. It's on the first ridge overlooking the river and you have some very nice houses with views they would pay $4 million for in LA. You will be impressed as well as surprised.
Forgive me for saying this, but I don't think you're ready to have kids yet. When you have a baby, your nightlife will consist of colic, teething, sleeplessness, and trying to get some chores done before you crawl into bed and start all over the next day. Then there's potty training and the terrible twos. My grandaughter is two, and she wears out my nine yr old. Next comes all the school functions and homework. Get the picture? It's not that bleak, but it sure is a full time job.
I don't blame you for not wanting to commute. I thought that perhaps there were trains into the city in your area. Here in CA, we have trains, but for most people it doesn't work. When my now ex, the kids, and me moved to the desert and bought a house, he did 3 hrs on the road both ways, until he was transferred. There were times that he would get home, eat and go to bed...then up again at 3 am. That's what you have to do to pay the bills. I don't recommend it, but sometimes you have to do things you don't like for the good of the family. My son in law spends approximately 300.00 a month driving to work. They don't have kids yet, but they're moving closer to his job where it will end up saving them money, as apposed to the insane rents down here.
You and your wife are young and newly married, and you still want to have fun. The minute you have your first baby, some internal switch will click and you'll both be yearning for suburbia and rural areas. You'll see ;-)