It's simple. Get the state out of the marriage business, and problem solved.
I agree marriage originally was a religiose practice, the state has no business regulating it.
It is ironic that many of the same people who are pushing for separation of church and removing any Christian reference from public are the same people wanting to regulate marriage a religiose practice, they can't have it both ways!
As for whether the church should accept different types of marriage, different churches have different practices, such as divorce , celibacy ect , There are churches for alternate lifestyles who already hold marriage ceremonies people can go there, we don't need government intervention in this.
Besides I am a widow and a single parent, where are my rights? I want a tax break, and insurance for my codependent such as my parent, and hospital visitation rights for my friends, why doesn't the governemnt care about me !
That can of worms would be worse than gay marriage.