Posted on 07/18/2004 5:37:40 PM PDT by CHARLITE
July 12, 2004 From OpEds.com http://www.opinioneditorials.com/freedomwriters/kpittman_20040712.html
Poor Little Rich Boy, John Edwards Karen Hathaway Pittman
Well, I guess the Bush/Cheney/Carlyle Cartel dreamed up that pipeline in Afghanistan and "invaded" Iraq because they were trailing their richer liberal counterparts: Together the President and Vice President are worth less than John Edwards (the would-be VP) alone--and they are worth many times less than John Kerry (the "he" who would be "P"). Kerry--who, as his political star has risen, has mysteriously shed his Vietnam-era boarding-school accent--is worth several times more than all THREE (Edwards, Cheney, and Bush) put together.
In point of fact, the Kerry/Edwards ticket is the richest Presidential ticket in all of American political history. And it's supported by some of the richest and most influential people, too--like the Titans of Tinseltown, for instance.
Here's how the dollars break down:
Kerry's estimated net worth (are you ready for this?) comes to (an apparently incalculable) $800 million - $1 BILLION. (Yes, you read it right. As Dr. Evil would say: One biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiilion dollars!)
Edwards' net worth weighs in at a solid $70 million.
Cheney's net worth totals approximately $50 million.
And Bush, that “venal” man? (We have it on solid authority he’s “venal.” How do we know? Chevy Chase, the man who made a vocation out of vacation, says so--that’s how.) Well, he’s a welter. His tally is a mere $15 million. (Apparently, the Prez is a lightweight fiscally, too. [Heck, before ya know it, even Michael Moore--that OTHER “poor man of the people"--will be richer than GWB.])
I guess Cheney had better start looking for a fresh place (besides Afghanistan) to dig . . . . (UAE, anyone? I mean, it's not like the guy can just jab a shovel into Saudi Arabia--what with his friends there, and all.])
I hate to be so blatant (after all, it's much less challenging than talking with my tongue stuck in my cheek), but I do have to ask: Who is more gullible?--the man who refuses to swallow without question the questionable "premises" of "Fahrenheit 9/11," or the man who thinks these two ultra-rich elitists (Kerry and Edwards) are (really) looking out for him?
At least Bush and Cheney don't pretend they're looking out for him. (They just pretend they aren't looking out for bin Laden.)
Edwards represents the little guys, like you and me . . . and guys who are even little-er, like mill workers--right? Well, I mean, that's the way he made his money, representing the little people . . . so he must be one of them, right?
There's an old but wise saw: Cater to the classes, dine with the masses; cater to the masses, dine with the classes.
Liberal Democrats like Kerry and Kennedy learned the truth of this maxim long ago. And so did Edwards. And that's why they're richer than Cheney and Bush will ever be. (It also helps if you marry a Ketchup Kween [instead of a teacher], your daddy's a bootlegger [instead of a former President of the United States], and you sue the pants off every doctor [except your own] who gets within five feet of you.)
And believe me, these guys know who butters their bread. The difference is: They PAY to have it buttered, then tell the butter-bearer how much they care. (Cry me a river.)
And while the bearers of butter are quietly eating Colonial in the kitchen, they're eating brioche (that French-inspired puff) in the dining room. ▪
Karen Hathaway Pittman is a published poet and freelance writer. You can reach her at tpittman7@comcast.net.
Naah! This is a non-story.
The beauty of America is that you can aspire to riches, no matter whether you work for them, or marry them.
The turd in this punchbowl, is if you take illegal money from foreign governments to further your own interests.
Gee, some corrupt people from Arkansas come to mind!
"In point of fact, the Kerry/Edwards ticket is the richest Presidential ticket in all of American political history."
Before writing an article, it is a good form to check the facts first. The richest ticket was Ross Perot's, who was at the time estimated (by magazines like Forbes) at about 3B.
Quiet, no one's supposed to know about this. ;)
It's kinda hard to smear the GOP as the 'rich' with these two running around
I just wish he'd find someone to remove that wart from his upper lip. Yeowwww. It's grossly disgusting.
John Kerry and John Edwards: The Fraiser and Niles of American politics.
That's funny. I thought when I first heard about this seyance he conducted in court that he was a few hush puppies shy of a barbeque platter, but having now seen Elizabeth, I can guess where they went, with butter...
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