[Bernard Marx]

George Soros will deliver a tribute to McCain and Feingold about the corrosive influence of Big Money on politics in a democracy.

Marc Rich will outline the Party's plan for increased economic ties with the EU in his new role as Secretary of Commerce.

Fidel Castro will do a stem-winder speech titled: "The Glowing Future of Progressive Politics in the Americas."

Mike Gorbachev, in his new role as International Environmental Messiah, will deliver a stirring speech titled "A New Green Future Under UN Guidance."

And so on.

[Othniel]

And for the finale, Marcel Marceau will deliver the keynote address on all the good the Dems have done over the years.