Posted on 09/26/2004 3:22:39 PM PDT by hipaatwo
John Kerry--he should have been a Canadian by Arthur Weinreb, Associate Editor, Canada Free Press
August 27, 2004
John Kerry was born in the wrong country; he would be much more at home in Canada than in the United States. He possesses a quality that the majority of Canadians have; that distinguishes us from all other peoples on earth. It’s what unites Canadians from coast to coast to coast.
Canadians love to whine.
And John F. Kerry is a whiner. This became absolutely apparent after he brought legal action against the Swift Boats Veterans who ran a negative attack ad pointing out that he may not be quite the military hero that he claims to be. As noted talk show host, Rush Limbaugh has said, George W. Bush has been subject to hatred since he came into office--and he takes it quietly. Kerry on the other hand, whines and moans after one negative ad is aired and goes running to the Federal Elections Commission with a gaggle of lawyers.
It is sometimes difficult to know exactly why Canadians love to whine and complain so much. The CBC has been criticized for their coverage of the Olympics where the on-air commentators seem to spend more time whining about Canada’s poor medal showing than they do reporting the events. Much like baseball is, south of the border, whining has become our national pastime. At least it doesn’t suffer from labour disputes and we can happily whine 365 days a year.
In democratic countries such as the United States and Great Britain, whose free and fair elections are almost never questioned, citizens occasionally get a tad upset with their government. So when the next election rolls around they throw the government out and bring in a new one. Not in Canada though. We whine and complain and then vote the same tired old Liberal government back in. And 20 minutes after they are reelected they act the same way as they always have and then we whine and complain again.
One reason for the constant boo-hooing is that we really do have it too good in this country. If we were faced with real problems, such as those that plague such countries as Iraq or Bangladesh, we wouldn’t have the time to sit around all day and complain.
Throughout the election campaign, John Kerry has shown that he would fit right in up in the Great White North. He would make a great advisor to Prime Minister Paul Martin. Since both men love to take both sides of each and every issue, they would be in constant agreement (or constant disagreement) on everything. You couldn’t ask for much more than that.
Kerry would also make a great Foreign Affairs Minister. Who better than Kerry to run down to New York and take marching orders from Kofi Annan at the U.N. (Useless Nothings)? John would have a ball getting approval of the French and the Germans for whatever stand Canada is told to take.
Kerry’s views on the military are consistent with the much touted "Canadian values". Only in Canada can you be a war hero and a peace activist at the same time. And Kerry’s testimony in the early 70s that American soldiers, including him, did nothing in Vietnam except rape, plunder and murder innocent civilians is just about how the Canadian elites view the American armed forces.
Kerry included himself in a military that commits war crimes. John would be pleased to know that Canada is a country that not only takes steps to keep war criminals out--we welcome them here with open arms.
There is no doubt about it — John Kerry would make an excellent Canadian http://www.torontofreepress.com/2004/weinreb082704.htm
No, Kerry should have been a Vietnamese. If he had been, there's a good chance he'd have been one of the million or so killed after the jackasses like him killed our efforts to free them. John has never had to deal with what he and his ilk ushered in for Vietnam and Cambodia. That's the real shame.
My opinion of the Great White North just rose a few degrees above freezing.
When I was growing up in Canada, all they did was whine about how the US never paid any attention to them....it was like they were in a sad codependent relationship with the US.
You'd think the people in Quebec would like to have Monsieur Kerry in their midst, except they're so damned anti-American up there.
Just wait a few weeks. He will be.
LOL!! This guy has it.
"John Kerry would make an excellent Canadian"
Perhaps it is not too late. Ter-ray-zaa after all is an "international woman", may they celebrate Christmas up north!
Is it too late? They can have him.
Perhaps we can auction him on eBay.
Well...he would have looked pretty snappy in a Mountie dress uniform, in a Dudley Do-Right kind of way.
Hey D1, maybe we can trade Kerry for some reasonable Canadian. Know any reasonable Canadians?
In a little over a month, monsieur JFK will join the funny farm along with ALGORE and HOWARDDEAN. He'll be running around the country screaming, but not many will listen.
I'm just sorry anyone is paying any attention to Bubba.
We'll trade John Kerry for Svend Robinson - even up.
Hell, I'd throw in Pierre Pettigrew - a twofer!
May I recommend the following soundtrack: "Crickets Chirping - The Collector's Set"
How about our friends the developers of Free Dominion, or perhaps even some of their contributors?
http://www.freedominion.ca/phpBB2/portal.php
More specifically, he should have been born a French Canadian. He looks French and sounds like a Canadian.
Do I trust Canadians?
HELL NO!!!
Acually I did appreciate the subtle humor. Note that I couldn't think of anyone famous. I agree with you for the most part. News coming out of Canada has been quite disconcerting for the last few years.
After he loses the election Kerry will become a Swiss citizen.
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