Bush Yard Sign part II [VANITY]

[GOP_Muzik]

I'm tired of losing my Bush/Cheney yard sign

[GOP_Muzik]

Yesterday I posted this thread about theft-proofing my thrice-stolen yard sign: Opinions Wanted on Bush Yard Sign [VANITY]

After serious thought and a phone call to my lawyer, I pulled the fish hook laden sign. I was angry because the last person who stole it hid the metal frame's vertical pieces in my grass so I would hit them with my lawn mower...which I did but luckily wasn't hurt.

When I was aerating my yard yesterday, my ankle was shredded by a bramble..for those who don't live in the south these are vines with thousands of razor-sharp thorns near the base that grow like crazy down here. Well, a light bulb went off in my head.

If you look at the picture, the vine is clearly visable because of the shade, but at night you can't see it at all. In fact, my wife walked right up to it in daylight and couldn't see it until she was 1 foot away.

I can't get sued for this, you can get caught on one of these in your own backyard, plus I planted it in the ground, so maybe it just grew around the sign. Actually I used 2 of them and planted them on each side and used twisty-ties to secure it. Notice I left the 20 gauge wire welded to the frame and attached it to a tree.

There is also a dye pack taped inside that will ooze slowly when placed horizontal. It consists of permanant red ink, flour, cayenne pepper, capsicum oil, and 30w transmission oil.

Let's just hope the cowards return to steal this one.

I know I'm obsessing over a silly sign, but I was really peeved

[gunnygail]

Too bad you can't set up an ambush at night and deliver a good beating. Still, try to get them on videotape and hit them with a trespassing and vandalism charge.

[GOP_Muzik]

If I had the time I would. My wife is already threatening to have me committed for going this far.

[Bikers4Bush]

This should be amusing. Waiting for a report on Monday.

[gunnygail]

Just set up the camera with an 8 hour tape, hidden in a window, before you hit the sack. Make sure there is a little illumination out there but not much.

[2banana]

This is great - helping the environment and helping Bush. Good thinking! Set up an motion cam with night vision video recorder if you have some money/time to burn...

[Joe Brower]

I like your style.

[FesterUSMC]

plant some landmines around the sign :^D about 2am while your sleeping you will we awaken to the sweet sound of a troll getting his @ss blown up! HEHEHEHE!

[Coop]

You know, it occurred to me yesterday that it would probably be rather simple (for someone smarter than me) to rig up one of those motion sensors that turn on outdoor lights for a custom use. Hook the motion sensor up to your sprinkler system, which just happens to be surrounding the area when someone approaches your yard sign(s). [grin]

[blackdog]

Hot glue some red snapper poly-tape high voltage twine to the sign edges. Connect it to a battery operated high voltage livestock fencer. If they touch it, POW! The same method works for male dogs who piss on your tires or shrubs.

[lodwick]

Good job - keep us informed as the sign war progresses.

[Heff]

I LIKE IT!!!!! I've been having the same problem too. I actually busted two kids on Saturday night and called the cops...they were going to charge them with trespassing, but backed off.

I have surrounded my signs with my dog's waste and have added a sign that says "Never mind the dog, Beware of the Owner" and it has a picture of a shotgun. I don't own a gun, but thought it was a nice touch.

[KJacob]

Tape a note to the sign that says "By stealing this sign you are guaranteeing another $10 donation to the RNC, Thanks for your contribution"

[eaglesiniowa]

We need to get yard signs that say: My other Bush Cheney sign was stolen by a tolerant and diverse Kerry lover.

[daniel boob]

I put out my yard sign after the across the street neighbor got his run over. I put a 1x4 piece of wood with nails hammered through under the sign. It is concealed pretty well.

Hopefully if someone attempts to run over the sign, their tires will be punctured. I hope I am awake if it does occur.

It is getting tense. I get the finger shot at me almost every morning on the way to work because of my W04 bumper sticker.

[Area51]

Now had it been me, I would have wired 110 to the sign and installed a small light to illuminate it at night.

Funny thing is, I don't do to well at wiring projects so the possibility a open circuit could happen is high, and by grabbing the sign one could become the actual circuit to ground. Lawns at night tend to draw condensation which allows for a great electrical connection. :)

[Nataku X]

If you really want to kick them in the nuts, put a note on the back of the sign saying, "Theft of this sign will result in an extra $20 being donated to the Republican Party. Thank you for helping support BC04."

[bvw]

Put on gloves and cut some habanero hot peppers and rub them all over the edge of the sign. Repeat nightly. Moke sure to wash and rewash the knife you cut them with.

Another trick is white paint -- the very very slow drying kind , it's sold in tubes, like grease -- or you could use white grease too. Carefully edge the sign with it -- can't be seen at night.

[Galroc]

I would put one of those battery operated alarms on the sign.

I just saw them on TV and you get about 10 for $10-20.

It is two parts. You stick the metal piece on the sign and the alarm/sensor near it on the ground. Someone who pulls the sign out of the ground will set off the alarm.

[mabelkitty]

That is hilarious!
Do keep us posted.
What would happen if you wet the poster with pepper spray and let it dry. Would there still be a pepper effect if someone got it on their hands and then rubbed their eyes later? Just curious....

[IllumiNaughtyByNature]

We need to get yard signs that say: My other Bush Cheney sign was stolen by a tolerant and diverse Kerry lover.

You could make a mint in the next 3 weeks if you actually print that.

:o)

[ProudEagle]

Bravo. Much better solution. And yep, I remember brambles. No fun at all. Good luck.

[savedbygrace]

This thread is now proof of your intent to do harm, if any of these leftist buggers sue you. What were you thinking?

[mnehring]

Wire your sign with this:


Give them a good buzz every time they try to pull it up.

[Pete'sWife]

Do you own a paintball marker?

[blackdog]

A Parmak battery operated high voltage fencer costs $35 and puts out 5000volts in pulses. The poly tape costs $15 for a 1000' roll and hot glue costs a few pennies. DC current at high voltage but low amperage can knock you out or leave you unable to move your arm for an hour. I once backed into my livestock fence on a hot day without my shirt on and the wire touched me at the back of my neck. Threw me fifteen feet and all I saw was a white flash. On a normal day when touched by hand, it will just feel like someone hit your arm with a sledgehammer.

[The Brush]

How about a note on the sign that says "The Nazi's hated freedom speech too... you must hate America"

[Galroc]

http://www.tvtimedirect.com/product_info.php?cPath=11&products_id=689

[Rebelbase]

DeerCam DC-200
35mm film Wildlife Scouting Camera

http://www.southernce.com/cgi-bin/SoftCart.exe/deercam.htm?E+scstore

[Gerasimov]

Someone came into campaign headquarters the other day and told us that she had smeared her yard sign in honey and Vaseline, saying, "During the day the bees guard my sign and at night anyone who takes it is going to have one heck of a mess on their hands!"

I thought that was pretty funny.

[Don Simmons]

Two words:

PELLET GUN

A good neck shot will nip this crap in the bud.

[blackdog]

Habanero peppers loaded in a blender and puree'd, strained and put in a spray bottle would do nicely. Just spray the sign lightly each evening. I won't even describe the pain after they go to the bathroom and handle their manhood. It takes about an hour for the tough skin on your hands to start hurting and swelling. But oh baby, everything you touch will swell and burn for hours.

And yes folks, I found this out while making nuclear salsa.

[SuziQ]

Heh, I LIKE the habanero idea!!

[ride the whirlwind]

Signs were disappearing in our area before we got ours, so when we put it up, hubby hung it up above
the garage door where all can see it but it's a bit more work to steal. A week or so later the neighbors
kitty corner from us put up a John Kerry sign

[Born Conservative]

Necessity is the mother of invention. Nice job.

[Fierce Allegiance]

Motion sensor sprinklers are commonly available. They run about $80, though. Many people with koi ponds use them to scare off heron. Just google "motion sensor sprinkler to find multiple sources.

[Coop]

I learn something new every day!

[Fierce Allegiance]

Ain't FR GREAT!

[PhiKapMom]

I like the way you think! This same thing happened to my Watts for Congress signs in 2000! They kept getting stolen -- irritating as heck -- it was a Ben Odom campaign person from down the street who was running against J.C. -- RATs have been doing this for years and years -- they have very little ethics.

[Rebelbase]

That is excellent! Just what I need to keep the neighor's dogs away from my mailbox landscaping when they are on their nightly walk.....I'll aim at the street to hit the neighbors, not the dog.

[GOP_Muzik]

This thread is now proof of your intent to do harm, if any of these leftist buggers sue you. What were you thinking?

Sued for getting attacked by a bramble? I don't think so.

[blackdog]

We have several large silos near the rodside. Each week during the year, we write a latin phrase in chalk and the kids draw a mural of some sort. It stays until the rain washes it off and all the motorists slow down to admire my kids artwork each week. Starting September I changed the theme of the slogans to latin phrases which lambaste Kerry in the body of the message. Stuff like Kerry is a french bastard(illegitimi Kerry francaise) and Kerry is a stupid french cow, Kerry's a french pancake and so on.....

People love it or hate it. Either way they can't get near it without getting mauled by livestock guardian dogs and beating a high voltage livestock fence.

I also used livestock marker crayons to paint the belly of my plane with a Bush 2004 slogan in 4' letters. It will wash off with a little solvent and hair conditioner. It reads real good from as high as 2000'.

[Fierce Allegiance]

It would be interesting to see if there is a way to rig up a pepper spray or lye or some other nasty source fluid instead of the garden hose, not that I would ever wish anyone any harm, of course.

[GOP_Muzik]

Do you own a paintball marker?

No, but I do own a 1901 10-gauge Winchester shot gun and a pretty little Browning 9mm.

[savedbygrace]

So, if someone trips while on your property and gets hurt, you don't think it would help their case to be able to prove you set up the conditions intentionally for someone to trip and get hurt?

OK, fine. (But it might be wise to read your homeowner's policy to see what obligations your insurance company has if you do something like that intentionally. If I were an insurance company, I'd put a clause in there saying I wouldn't be responsible for paying such a claim. But that's just me.)

[New Perspective]

My parents had their flag stolen a couple of times. So the last time my dad rubbed poison ivy all over it. So if they took it they would pay a price for it.

You may want to check with your local authorities, taking signs from private property may be against the law.

[dr.j'sfirst]

A family in our area made up a new sign after theirs was taken: You can steal my sign, but you cannot change my vote.
They took it to Kinko's and had it enlarged and laminated. I thought it was an excellent response and let others know what Kerry supporters are really up to.

Good luck!

[New Perspective]

Oh my, your one devilish guy. How would you ever think of something so awful and so hurtful?

One question, what size strainer should I use?

[GOP_Muzik]

Were they committing a CRIME against me when they tripped and got hurt? Don't forget, tresspassing and stealing MY property is still a crime. This isn't a booby trap, it is mother nature.

You can get seriously cut on a bramble if you climb over my fence with the intent to burglarize my house. The liability is exactly the same.

I already called my lawyer, and he said it was a great idea.

[Range Rover]

Learned this a long time ago - Prussian High Spot Blue is used to mark metal. It takes a LONG time to dry if you get the right stuff. You will NEVER get it out of clothing and you'll damn near have to rip your skin apart trying to get it off your hands.

The BC04 sign is blue....applying some of this substance to the blue areas will assure you of permanently "marking" whomever is pilfering your signage.

You should be able to find this stuff at a machinist supply or over the internet.