Posted on 11/25/2004 7:56:40 PM PST by Aussie Dasher
MARK Latham will celebrate his first anniversary as opposition leader on Wednesday, but no one is betting on him lasting to his second.
If Labor looked split when Mr Latham took over the leadership last December, the rifts are gaping a year on.
He has been labelled a dead parrot by a former Beazley adviser, a narcissist who won't listen to anyone by anonymous frontbenchers, and a bully by a state Labor premier.
He has allegedly had an angry bust-up with factional heavyweight Stephen Conroy, accusing him of leaking internal ructions to journalists, and says one journalist has been sold so many pups by Labor leakers that he could open a pound.
Meanwhile, Latham supporters ask journalists if they know the frontbencher responsible for a critical magazine story this week, then mutter darkly about members of the Left faction.
One frontbencher says Mr Latham's like someone with a bad case of sunburn – "even looking at him hurts".
After going backwards at the election and losing ground in opinion polls since, Opposition MPs are cranky, fractious and looking for answers.
In a perfect world, everyone would have been able to take a couple of months off to rest and lick their wounds in private after almost a year of constant campaigning.
Instead, weary from the battle and dispirited at the prospect of at least another three years out of government, opposition MPs have had to gather again in Canberra for three torturous sitting weeks of Parliament, followed by seemingly endless post-mortem examinations of what went wrong.
It is a bit like being cut out of a car wreck and raced to hospital, then being asked to sign the loan documents on a new car while on the operating table.
Internally, the Labor caucus is split into three camps – those who voted against Mr Latham last December and now feel vindicated, those who took a chance on him and now wonder what would have happened on October 9 if they had not, and a small band of Latham loyalists who are sticking by their man.
His problem is that he does not have a large store of goodwill within his party.
His prickly personality and loner attitude have earned him few friends in his nine years in federal parliament.
And his reaction to the election defeat, particularly his reshuffle of the Labor front bench, has got many offside within the party.
"There's always winners and losers but there's a handful of people who weren't his supporters who he's chosen to kick in the guts," one demoted frontbencher says.
Some frontbenchers are even suggesting that there is not the goodwill for Mr Latham that there was for his predecessor Simon Crean – an astonishing claim given the months of destabilisation before Mr Crean's eventual departure.
Outside the caucus, Mr Latham is getting conflicting advice from all quarters on how Labor can recover from the devastating loss.
Move away from unions, move closer to unions, plan for the long term, fight for immediate survival – the advice is coming thick and fast from former prime ministers, party officials and commentators.
Former prime minister Bob Hawke says Labor should be celebrating what unions have done for Australia, while former Hawke minister Barry Cohen says Labor's union affiliations have alienated small business.
Former party national secretary Barry Jones says Labor has erred by walking away from its traditional left-wing social agenda, but union leader and Labor national executive member Bill Shorten says the party has tried to appease the left at the expense of the right.
No wonder people accuse Mr Latham of not listening – when everyone has a different opinion, someone is bound to feel overlooked.
In addition to the open political arguments, Labor's staff ranks are haemorrhaging, with 11 positions advertised last Saturday, including a speech writer and economics adviser for the determinedly independent Latham.
Some caucus critics have predicted a leadership spill by Christmas, while Foreign Minister Alexander Downer, himself a short-lived former opposition leader, says Kim Beazley will be back as Labor leader long before the next election.
Bookmakers won't take bets on how long Mr Latham will last as leader.
They argue that, because the matter will be settled by the Labor caucus – a relatively small (and even smaller since the election) group of people – it would be possible for someone with inside knowledge to profit.
But Mr Latham continues to argue that he will be around until the next election.
"After an election loss, obviously people put their point of view," Mr Latham said today.
"Some of them let off steam, we're seeing that. The bulk of our caucus is dedicated to the policy review and getting it right next time and that's the major point."
And he shrugs off Mr Downer's criticism.
"I mean, he was the world's worst practice as an opposition leader, so I'm not going to take too many tips off him. He was an absolute catastrophe and the Liberal Party, I'm sure, remember that too well."
This crowd make Kerry and the Dems look positively robust by comparison.
Ah, there's nothing quite like kicking the left when it's down...
Next: John F. Kerry, (and maybe I'm dreaming) Helen Clark, Paul Martin, Gerhard Schroeder...
Just remember where it all started...
I trust there is a space in Canada for Latham. He would instantly become a Canadian Liberal Party Minister for as long as he wants - heck, if he rushes up to learn French, or opt to become the second Carolyn "D**n Americans, I hate those ba#@ards!" Parrish.
He may well fit in in Canada. God knows, there's no place for him in Australia.
The thing about political dead parrots is that their supporters stoutly maintain that they are not dead at all. In the words of the immortal Monty Python television sketch, their parrot is not dead -- just "resting", or "pining" or "stunned". The rest of the world, however, knows that in the words of the purchaser of the parrot in that sketch: "He's not pining! He's passed on! This parrot is no more! This is an ex-parrot!!"
I'm hoping Labor won't realise it has an "ex-parrot" until AFTER the next election.
Maybe they could give Crean another go :)
Prayers, please!!!!
Or how about Peter Garrett?
I'm not sure we'd be up to a full-scale war with the United States.
I don't know, I think it might have its up side. We might end up living under the US constitution.
isn't big bad Kim Beazley making another comeback? Or should I say Nellie Melba Beazley??
I know a couple of people close to Beasley. He isn't going to run for the leadership, in fact it'll be a shock if he doesn't resign at the next election.
The only reason Beasley hung around in this election was because several senior US officials ASKED him to (the idea was that Beasley was to be the voice of sanity on the Labor front bench).
I am still waiting for the real Latham to rear its ugly head.
So here we all are to see the Labor Party implode once again...seems like old times
The Perth Pachyderm? Anything is possible with this rabble.
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