Drivel comes to mind.
I offer as exhibit A ...
I don't know how Gabe is, or even who he is for that matter. I don't know whether he became the Rock Star I wanted him so desperately to become, but I'm not sure if I really care about that. Despite not knowing, something deep inside me tells me that he is fine, and that everything makes sense in his life, at least the way he would define it.
Gabe is a banker now dude.
The author seemed to think he had something important to say, but instead wrote a poor man's version of an episode for a show like The Wonder Years.
As Telemann's Tafelmusik plays on my CD drive at this moment, I cannot say I feel any connection to Pantera either.