Another great tip are twisted Christmas songs, to play when the tension is getting to you. We have an extensive collection by various artists. Laughter is the best medicine.
How wise and thoughtful of you cake crumb. God Bless You!
"I drink either Diet Coke (blood sugar probs) or ginger ale and bitters...in a short glass, with a sip stick."
My advice is to stay away from diet drinks. Bitters and ginger ale is fine. However, if you can have bottled water for these latter two's do so.
And, since your username has cake in it, here's is another great piece of advice: stay away from layer cakes and anything with so-called butter cream. They will kill you! I know, I was in the business.
BTW, I'm a diabetic.
I assume you do know that coffee will not sober up a drunk and are merely providing an alternative 'acceptable' liquid for their refreshment and an excuse to curtail their alcohol consumption.
It always amazes me how many people believe (falsely) that caffeine is an antidote to alcohol. If you give an inebriated person an entire pot of coffee, all you end up with is a wide awake drunk. The alcohol is still in their bloodstream until the kidneys filter it out. Coffee may make them urinate more frequesntly but it does not speed up the process of filtration.