Couldn't help but laugh about the "wife unit" line. My wife always asked "Theirs, I hope"? Funniest shirt was the one I brought home after getting between two drag queens on crank. Smelled like a perfume factory, and had more makeup on my shirt (dk blue) than she had on her vanity. Shirt was cut (nail file?) and I didn't know it 'cause of my vest.
Sounds like a strong and good woman you have there. Pleased to hear she has a sense of humor about it.