Posted on 06/14/2005 6:23:16 PM PDT by wagglebee
We have a winner!!!!
Have I been added to the WTF ping list yet? If not, please add me!
Please add me to the WTF ping list.
Personally........I don't think he has any.
I agree!
That unforunately is a simpistic outlook on abusive relationships. Decision-making becomes impaired where using the so-called brain is not the issue at all. This is an issue of the will which unfortunately becomes weakned through intimidation and fear.
You should read up on it.
When we see a wussie guy acting stupid for whatever reason we don't give him an episode of Oprah and explain why he can't do the smart thing. We don't cauddle the heck out of him and assuage his guilt for not being able to do what's right.
In guy culture, it's almost perfectly acceptable to go slap him upside the head and tell him "snap out of it, dumb ass!"
Methinks the ladies need to adopt some of that bravado.
Another example that fits this pattern. If a woman has some hormonal or depressive episode and kills her children, we get the proverbial Oprah TV treatment and we all get to learn new things about how pregnency is hard, how women are not responsible for their behaviors an so on...
But if a guy has his own hormonal problems, say with testosterone for example, and say, has a habit of throwing his fist through the walls, we don't explain away his responsibility for his behavior. The most tame treatment we give him is to tag him with a euphimistic "anger management issues" label, and tell him to do something about that before we take his family away from him, steal his wages, and cart his butt off to jail.
Basically, what I am saying is my perception is that our society holds men more accountable for their actions and accepts far fewer excuses for bad behavior.
And before anyone assumes otherwise, I am not at all arguing that we should release men from the higher standard of ownership and responsibility for their actions. I am wishing that the females in society would step up and encourage each other (maybe not with the back of head slap :-) to truthfully see when women are doing foolish things, or when they should own culpability.
Well this just can't be. There isn't one word about drugs making him do this. Marcel can't be evil. The cause must be something else like drugs and/or alcohol.
I say poke one of his eyes out.
I am one for personal reponsibility in one's actions. Even if those actions are precipitated by hormones, intimidating partners, and what not. With all the poor choices I have made in my life, I am responsible for each and every one of them, even if I had biochemical issues or emotional issues which led me to make those poor choices.
So I am not disagreeing with you. Men and women both need to be held to a very high standard of accountabiliyt. I HATE the victim mentality. It is much better for society when people own up to their actions and make amends, or make good healthy changes away from destructive behavior.
I don't think it should be a higher standard for males than females.
Another dysfunctional couple with no moral fiber. The sad part is they had a child to witness their hell-infested relationship.
People like this shouldn't be allowed to have goldfish, let alone children.
I think that the only way you can change that is if you take some of Dr. Laura's DNA and splice it into Oprah :-)
LOL!
No they shouldn't. Agreed.
BS. Conservatrix is right about this and you have no idea of what you are talking about.
Please add me to your WTF ping list.
You've got a baby coming, Al?
Ok, you're right. When women do really stupid things to themselves, we shouldn't even try to hold them to the same standard of personal responsibility that we hold men.
no just a saying like he hit him so hard his sister felt it ect.
That unfortunately is a simplistic outlook on abusive relationships. Decision-making becomes impaired where using the so-called brain is not the issue at all. This is an issue of the will which unfortunately becomes weakened through intimidation and fear.
She was explaining to you what happens to the mind of an abused woman. You are trying to twist that into something completely different.
All she is telling you is how manipulative an abuser can be and you are often unable to think the same way you might.
You are sitting at your computer, with quite an air of superiority, deciding what an abused woman should do.
You are either a man or some self righteous woman who thinks she would never let herself get into such a situation.
I used to think I would never let it happen to me, but it did. He was so unbelievably smooth and manipulative that by the time he showed his true demon-self, I was so confused that I was nowhere close to the same woman I had been before, and am now.
Until you have experienced something similar or think about this with an open mind, I think you should just STFU.
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