Posted on 06/15/2005 10:55:42 AM PDT by NormsRevenge
Why not?
Alright, well that's at least something. As long as you can end each fight with wild passionate sex, that's good.
We've been at it for 30 years.
Already got one. ;) DH is NOT allowed to touch any of my my power tools, my tool box or my garden tools, except for the tiller and lawn mower, LOL!
I am not allowed to touch his cellphone, computer, DVD & video stuff, digital camera or video camera.
Works for us. ;)
We've been married ten years and have argued enough for your 30 plus our 10!
Some marriages are lubricated by bickering.
Holy Cow, she sapped his will to live!
Nice cardigan sweater, tho...
Yes, but I understand that after three days without sleep, psychotic episodes become increasingly likely.
Dan
Shiny things? I got my wife a coffin for her birthday and she hasn't even used it!!
So this country couple, Betty and Samuel Johnston, were getting ready to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. The kids and grandkids decided to throw them a big party down at the church complete with a renewel of their wedding vows in front of the whole town.
The festivities went well but all the time, the pastor noticed that Samuel wasn't really showing too much excitement. Later in the evening, when things were winding down, the pastor noticed Samuel sitting out on the steps of the church gazing out into the night lost in thought. The pastor decided to find out what was bothering ol' Samuel.
The pastor sat down next to Samuel and noticed Sam's red eyes and a tear on his cheek, "Sam, you seem to have something on your mind. You know, it might help if you share it with a friend..."
Sam looked at the pastor, "Father Thomas, I've been thinking. Do you know how Betty and I got married?"
"Well, no, I never heard the story. But I have the time right now if you do..."
"Father Thomas, we were young." Sam began as he wiped another tear, "It was spring of 1955... Senior year in high school. I was captain of the football and baseball teams, Betty was the captain of the cheerleading squad. We were the all-american couple, "Most likely to succeed" we were, our futures shined bright."
"Sounds wonderful Sam."
"Well, it was, Father Thomas. We had the world by the tail."
"And....?" Father Thomas asked.
"Well, Betty's folks, you remember Martha and LLoyd, dontcha?"
"Yes, Sam, I do. Wonderful folks."
"Well, one day Betty and I got together and were looking for something to do. We were over at Betty's farm on her folk's front porch. We started huggin' on each other and started gettin' to feeling a little amorous, if you know what I mean..."
Father Thomas chuckled.
"Well, we looked at each other and knew right away what we were going to do next. So, we dashed off that front porch and headed straight for the barn and up into that loft."
"Oh... my!" Father Thomas whispered with a knowing smile.
"You see, we knew Betty's daddy, LLoyd was out on the back 40 oversseing the help in the cotton fields so we knew we had plenty of time. We couldn't help ourselves. We were so much in love with each other that we just through caution to the wind."
"Sam, as a man of the cloth, I must caution you..."
"Sorry, Father Thomas. But, you know, we.. uh, well...."
"Say no more, Sam."
"Well, Father, anyhow, we were lost in ourselves when all of a sudden the barn door burst open. It was Betty's daddy and he was hotter than fire! He screamed up at me and told me to get my butt down that ladder and off his property before he skinned me alive. I tried to reason with him, but he wasn't in the mood to do any listening."
"Hmmmm, I'm sure he wasn't," replied the pastor.
"Well Father, I get down to the bottom of the ladder, still trying to fasten my belt, when ol' Lloyd grabbed me by the ear and spun me around to face him. Ol' Lloyd looked me in the eye and he said, "Son, I'll give you two choices." He said, "You will marry my daughter and make an honest woman out of her...," he snorted, "..or I'm gonna call my fishin' partner, Sheriff Handley, and he'll come down here, haul you off to jail and lock you away for 50 years! 50 YEARS!!! DO YOU HEAR ME?!"
"Well, that must have been quite a scary prospect for a 17 year old."
"You bet it was, and he was madder 'n hell, uh, 'scuse me Father."
"No problem, Sam. But look on the bright side. You made the right decision. You married a wonderful woman, you have four wonderful children who have given you 10 lovely grandchildren. You have a nice farm in the God's glorious country and proper standing in the community. All in all, I'd say you have had a glorious life. So why are you so sad on this wonderful occasion, Sam?"
"Father Thomas..." Sam replied as he began to sob again, "I'D BEEN GETTIN' OUT TOMORROW!"
We are now at 34 years! Our secret to not arguing is to argue naked. Do you know how stupid you look standing there yelling at someone while you are buck naked? It really points out how important the issue is to each of you if you are willing to strip down and duke it out.(usually only one is willing to strip and the other concedes).
*SIGH* ;)
How about a shiny new vacuum cleaner?
The basement and the garage is mine!
The male cycle of life. You're born, and you're allowed to use the upstairs. Then you're sent to the basement for the teenage years. Then you get married and you're allowed to use the upstairs --for a while. Then you end up in the basement and garage again.
funny!
Now, THAT'S funny.
You are a sage observer of life!
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