[sonofatpatcher2]

Hey Jen, how are you doing today?

Wahoooo Jen, how you like my new shades?

Not now, Bender! This is OFFICIAL Free Republic Yahoo Fantasy Football League Business from the Commissioner of the league... ME!

Okay, I'm sorry...

Now to business... Jen, by the authority of the Free Republic Yahoo Fantasy Football League as High Commissioner of said league, I hereby decree that your player, one Byron Leftwich, position quarterback, will from this moment on and forever now on be known as "Byron Rightwingwich."

This decree is irrevocable and permanent. My staff is already busy notifying Bryon, the Jacksonville Jaguars, the National Football League, all television networks and the print media of this ruling.

Sorry, Jen, but your request to have all your players undergo sex change operations so that your Team Notice would read "Yo fellas! This all girl team is gonna kick yer butts!" cannot be granted. This decision has nothing to do with the fact that your players would then be prettier than my players.

Now, with all Official business out of the way... Jen! You're the little vamp that got Tony Gonzalez... I wanted him bad.

Yeah, Son was moaning and bitching about that all last night!

Well, for once, Bender is telling the truth...

[Jen]

Hi guys! I'm supposed to be working on some VisalBasic projects, but I'm procrastinating... Cool shades Bender! Are you thinking your fantasy football future's so bright you gotta wear shades? ;-)

Thanks Mr Commissioner, with the name change I might be able to tolerate QB "Rightwingwich" on my roster. I mean seriously - the REDstate team can't have a LEFTy leading it on the field!!!

So... now, "who" is that guy? Any of y'all heard of Byron LeftRightwingwich???

T-Man, have you been drinking Bender's WD-40 again??? I don't want my team to have sex changes!!! Ewwwwwwww! Could you imagine how ugly some of those guys would be as girls - especially the 300-pound linemen! 8-/

And... who is this Tony Gonzalez that you want so bad??? Maybe we can work a trade.