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I had just picked up my new Lexus RX400h, when I realized I'd have to return to the dealer the next day.

My only complaint was that I just couldn't figure out how the new sophisticated sound system worked. The salesman was very nice about it, and actually took time to explain that the radio was voice activated.

"Watch this!" he said, "Nelson!" The radio replied, "Ricky or Willie?" "Willie!" he continued, and On The Road Again came from the speakers.

With that I drove away a happy camper. For the next few days, every time I'd say, "Beethoven!", I'd get beautiful classical music. And if I said, "Beatles!", I'd get one of their awesome oldies. This was really nice.

Then one day, it almost ended as a couple ran a red light and nearly creamed my new car. I was barely able to avoid them by swerving and just about lost control. All I could come up with on the spur of the moment was, "ASSHOLES!"

Then out of nowhere the French National Anthem began to play, sung by Jane Fonda and Michael Moore, backed up by John Kerry on guitar, Al Gore on drums and Bill Clinton on sax....

I love this car.