Posted on 01/22/2006 7:52:38 AM PST by SJackson
Wisconsin needs an official state tartan about as much as Scotland needs an official state bratwurst. Or about as much as Texas needs an official state tall ship, Louisiana needs an official state meat pie and Oklahoma needs an official state cartoon character.
Strike those last three. It turns out those actually are official state items.
Which explains why the state Assembly is considering a bill that would officially designate a tartan, a plaid of Scottish origin, as an official state symbol to join the 21 other official state symbols, ranging from the official state dance (the polka) to the official state dirt (Antigo silt loam, officially referred to as the official state soil).
State Rep. Suzanne Jeskewitz, R- Menomonee Falls, put all the officialism this way: "Sometimes you do things like this because. . . you don't see a reason not to."
We'd like to point out that's not the only case where our lawmakers don't see reason, but that would require a separate editorial.
In this case they ought to see that they have overlooked a good reason to designate all sorts of official state symbols the opportunity to sell naming rights.
Back in the early 1990s, state Rep. James Holperin was making a failed attempt to get the hodag, a legendary creature of logging camp tales, designated the official state mythical beast. He noted that proposals to name "official" state things are sometimes introduced seriously and sometimes "kind of tongue in cheek." We'll let you decide which applies to our intentions with "official" naming rights. But we ask you to imagine the possibilities.
Just think what the state could have reaped from selling the naming rights to the official state fish (which is, officially, the muskellunge). What would the muskie fanciers, bass anglers and catfish catchers be willing to bid to get their fish of favor named "official," or, better yet, "o'fish-al"?
Considering that the 350 souls of Halfway, Ore., once got $100,000 for their school by selling the naming rights to the town (which temporarily became Half.com to promote a Web site) what could Wisconsin have received for the naming rights to the official state dog (the American water spaniel)? Get the dog lovers organizations involved, and you're talking real money.
What about the group of fourth-graders from Merrill who, in the late 1980s, tried to get the cranberry muffin designated the official state muffin? The Legislature turned them down, even threatening to introduce competing legislation to use the official muffin title on the meadow muffin, which, for those of you not familiar with agricultural terminology, does not pop from the oven but rather drops from the hindquarters of a cow. Wouldn't it have been smarter to tell the kids to go home, organize a bake sale (with cranberry muffins, of course) and buy the naming rights?
Think Wisconsin has already exhausted most of its naming rights opportunities, with 21 state symbols already designated (not counting the official state seal, motto and flag)? Nonsense.
According to the lists of state symbols maintained by www.netstate.com, here is a partial accounting of the official state things Wisconsin lacks: spider, bat, snack food, painting, tug-of- war championship, vehicle, jelly, crustacean, vegetable, musical instrument, meal, barbecue championship, quilt and shrub.
North Carolina has an official state blue berry, which is the blueberry (what were the other candidates?). The cranberry may be Wisconsin's official fruit, but the state has no official berry of blue, black or boyson.
And it's not as if you can only have one of each official state thing. Tennessee has five official state songs. New Hampshire has nine. Wisconsin has only one, "On, Wisconsin."
So by all means, let's wear an official state tartan. But first, let's negotiate the price.
Scotland Forever
More wasted time by overpaid underworked 'law makers'
more interested in keeping their tax payer funded jobs
then doing what they are supposed too...
imo
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