October 14, 1987 After 4 attempts, Joel gets his letter read on Letterman. He writes "Hey Dave, Flunky sucks". Flunky, the Late Night manic depressive clown responds, "Hey you little weasel, bite me".
July 10, 1992 After a regrettable sexual experience, a despondent Joel confides in his now single Dad who he is living at home with for the summer. "So you had sex with her...It's no big deal", he says. "Oh, I didn't sleep with her", Joel says. Dad replies, "If you're going to step up to the plate, you might as well hit a home run."
November 21, 1993 In Joel's sixth week as a writer for the Martha Stewart TV show, she fires him in order to hire her friend. She forgot, however, to ask her friend if she wanted the job. Joel is rehired 16 hours later.
December 10, 1994 On his fourth round of interviews for MTV's The Real World - London, Joel is set up on a date with a bald chick. They date for three months.
April 14, 2000 Joel and friend, Ross Novie, accompany Colin Malone of Colin's Sleezy Friends to interview porn star Raylene backstage at an LA strip joint. After asking politely, Joel touches his first fake breast.
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