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Open Editorial: You Named Your Baby WHAT???
Onyx Magazine ^
| March, 2006
| Josephine Hammond
Posted on 03/30/2006 12:41:35 PM PST by twippo
click here to read article
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To: twippo
I'm surprised more babies aren't named after Wisconsin towns and cities...
C'omre Mishawauka!
Ashwaubenon. Where's your daddy!
Put that pistol down Menomonie!
Waukesha! Watch your little brother for me.
Is Fredonia home yet?
Tell Delafield her dinner's ready.
Menasha's not home.
101
posted on
03/30/2006 12:59:26 PM PST
by
toddlintown
(Lennon takes six bullets to the chest, Yoko is standing right next to him and not one f'ing bullet?)
To: LS
There were very wealthy sisters in Texas many years ago, whose last name was Hogg. Their father must have hated them; he named them Ima and Ura.
I'm totally not making this up.
To: twippo
If I were an African-American and my parents gave me one of the silly names mentioned in this article, I'd legally change my name.
. . . to "Osborne Black," of course.
To: John 6.66=Mark of the Beast?
In the same way, why are blacks and whites are the only ethnic groups in this country to be referred to by skin color?
104
posted on
03/30/2006 12:59:45 PM PST
by
twippo
(Mutt-American #2.)
To: absolootezer0
Funniest name I have ever seen on a resume that crossed my desk.
E'merg'ancy Ro'om.
No, I couldn't make it up if I tried.
To: brytlea
True story...
Teacher: "What's your name, young lady?"
Elementary Student: "Atolia."
Teacher: "Yes, dear, I know you told me last week but I don't remmeber it."
106
posted on
03/30/2006 12:59:53 PM PST
by
Cletus.D.Yokel
(Making illegal activities illegal since...since...since...)
To: twippo
I do not advocate naming all our children Bobby and Susie.How about "A boy named Sue"?
To: twippo
Bump for later read. This is going to get good.
RnC
108
posted on
03/30/2006 1:00:10 PM PST
by
rustyncrusty
(Where liberty dwells, there is my country. - Ben Franklin)
To: bonfire; Alouette
Condoleeza ...... well, it doesn't have a "Q" !
109
posted on
03/30/2006 1:00:20 PM PST
by
EDINVA
To: Alouette
I would like to add that this rule should go for us white parents who think we must give our children "special" one off spellings for regular names. It's not cute. It's illiterate. Every parent shoud check out the corresponding chapter in Freakonomics.
To: eyedigress
How about Lemonjello ("Le'mon'jelow")
Probable urban myth.
111
posted on
03/30/2006 1:00:29 PM PST
by
Atlas Sneezed
(Your FRiendly FReeper Patent Attorney)
To: bonfire
"Condoleeza just sounds Southern."
I thought it was Italian.
To: TNCMAXQ
what about Dweezle Zappa?
113
posted on
03/30/2006 1:01:01 PM PST
by
ken5050
(Ann Coulter needs to have children ASAP to propagate her gene pool. Any volunteers?)
To: ShadowAce
Fe-male-ay was a character in the ovie Angel Heart, if I remember correctly.
To: TNCMAXQ
At least most people can spell Scout and Apple. Other than being strange names they are at least workable.
115
posted on
03/30/2006 1:01:12 PM PST
by
TXBubba
( Democrats: If they don't abort you then they will tax you to death.)
To: twippo
Thank you ma'am. She nails it. I'd hate to be a teacher and try to conduct roll call.
116
posted on
03/30/2006 1:01:13 PM PST
by
TheSpottedOwl
("Life is a box of chocolates. Eat them before they eat you ".---me.)
To: ShadowAce
Fe-male-ay was a character in the...movie Angel Heart, if I remember correctly.
There, I fixed it.
To: Red Badger
That has long been a name that applies to either gender. Shirley Povich (father of Maury) was a major sportswriter here in the Washington area for decades.
To: ken5050
"what about Dweezle Zappa?"
How about Moon Unit?
119
posted on
03/30/2006 1:01:47 PM PST
by
toddlintown
(Lennon takes six bullets to the chest, Yoko is standing right next to him and not one f'ing bullet?)
To: Alouette
120
posted on
03/30/2006 1:01:55 PM PST
by
gogeo
(The /sarc tag is a form of training wheels for those unable to discern intellectual subtlety.)
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