[tfecw]

Pretty much,

I used to say "yes ma'am", but two weeks in NY, and about a 100 "don't call me ma'am"s later i stopped.

[Nea Wood]

I used to say "yes ma'am", but two weeks in NY, and about a 100 "don't call me ma'am"s later i stopped.

Not to defend rudeness, but sometimes women don't like being called "ma'am" because it makes them feel old. Plus, oftentimes female salesclerks are snotty to female customers by saying "ma'am" in a condescending tone. Like a female standup comedian once said, "We women know what 'ma'am' really means. It means the 'B' word." Not really, but sometimes salesclerks make us feel that way.

Anyway, you're a gentleman, and none of this is your fault. But try saying "yes, Miss." I bet you'll get a sweeter response. :-)

[ExpatGator]

My reply to the request "don't call me ma'am" is always "yes ma'am." Kill 'em with kindness.

[Young Scholar]

I think that's more of a regional thing than an indication that people are ruder in NY, since even very well-mannered people up here don't use "ma'am." We still sometimes use "sir," but only when speaking to people like police officers.

[joylyn]

I'm a woman who has lived in New York City for thirty years and people get suspicious because I say please and thank you. They figure I'm either mentally challenged or a con artist. City people can be provincial, too. Don't let them change you.

[HungarianGypsy]

The first homeschooling family I ever met had children who said "ma'am" and "sir". I thought it quaint and have since worked on teaching my children the same. I even have the habit of saying it. I mentioned this on an email list on I am on. A lot of the women said they did not like it when people said ma'am. One even said children sound snotty when they say it. I think it might if forced, but not when it's a habit.

It's incredibly cute to hear my three year old ask, "Are you are a sir or a ma'am?" since he is still trying ot figure it out.

[Casaubon]

being from TX I say "mam" all the time.

everytime I have been up north my use of mam has had mixed reviews.
1: Don't call me mam...I am not old enough
2: Mam?!?!...this is 2006 don't use those old repressive anti-women words to me!
3: Mam?...oh how sweet...nice to see a gentleman still exist.
4: Mam??...you are not from here are you??

I refuse to change from being a southern gentleman so "mam" will stay in my dictionary...right next to "y'all"

[buckeyesrule]

***I used to say "yes ma'am", but two weeks in NY, and about a 100 "don't call me ma'am"s later i stopped.***

It's kinda funny to watch American Idol sometimes when you have alot of these young singers who grew up in the south who have been taught to refer to elders as "yes maam", "no maam", and the older New Yorkers or Hollywood types are like UGHH!!!! stop calling me maam. LOL!