Posted on 04/25/2006 6:38:23 AM PDT by Cincinatus' Wife
I've gone to some very sad funerals, but none so sad that I wished I'd never known the person.
True point. I could not imagine not having my wife and children and God is in charge so we really don't know what will happen. Thirty years with someone is better than none. I would imagine six months with someone is better than none also.
LOL! Seriously, part of the issue is that the longer you're single, the more set in your ways you become, and the less likely you are to change your ways to accommodate a new lifestyle.
My wife and I married (only marriage for both) in our mid-late thirties. By then, we both had careers, had our own things, and we were both used to doing what we wanted without needing anyone else's buy-in or blessing.
After we tied the knot, I didn't think we'd make it a year. That first six months was misery. Then, we gradually knocked the rough edges off each other, laid down some groundrules as to how we'd live our lives, and worked things out. It wasn't easy, but we survived it.
I love my wife, and I know she loves me. But we both agree on one thing: If anything should ever happen to one of us, the other would NEVER consider marrying again.
Liar, liar, pants on fire:
That's because it's all about them and what their infantile wants.
There's the generalization right there. As for me, my cup runneth over, but just keep it up with your ASSumptions. Certainly proves the old saying is true.
rimshot
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I don't think I agree with everything you've said, but the point of American men looking elsewhere for brides isn't a new story.
Back in the early days of my Navy career, it was pretty common for men to actively seek and court Oriental/Island women, affectionately (and probably bigot-like) referred to as "rice-burners." Many men found the concept of marrying a "corn-eater" unfathonable.
In general, their attitutudes toward American women could be summed up as "not worth putting up with." That was well over 20 years ago. So the Russian bride syndrome isn't anything new.
I thought by this time this thread would have several hundred posts, with some of the usual suspects hurling invectives with abandon, while avoiding the issue which your above statement points out.
Heck, ask an American female in an unguarded moment about what she thinks about how her counterparts act and she isn't all that glowing in the report. Granted, this anectdotal from my experience. Additionally, some of those females who I've had this conversation with then run out and engage in the same behavior they just disparaged.
It appears that the marriage strike is growing. There are other instances of your stereotypical 30 year old living in his parent's basement, but I think that is much less the problem than the fact that the current environment is fairly hostile to men when a relationship goes bad. This is made worse by a legal system that originally was formed to help women based on an older set of values, but then hijacked by opportunists who have turned it into a way to punish men just because of their gender.
If compared to a casino in Vegas, would you dare want to gamble there, knowing that the odds are highly stacked against you?
Words of wisdom.
In the 70's people were talking about not wanting to bring children into this world. I think they didn't care enough to help out the world or put effort into rearing children who would be an asset to humanity. A lot of those types are still around.
I dunno, meeting women isn't hard.. meeting a woman to marry is probably a bit tougher, but frankly if one isn't looking to get married (which it sounds like most of these guys aren't or weren't) one is very likely not to ever be.
Yes, "modern" american women, a lot of em can be superficial and frankly basket cases when it comes to expectations in a long term relationship... but not all.
I meet women all the time, I am happily married, so I'm not looking for a wife, but I'd say about 50% of those I spend any time with that I have met would certainly be on the "possible" list if I was looking.. the other 50% are either too self absorbed, to superficial, to selfish, or have personality or world views that I know from experience would clash to hard with my own to be successful, or while nice gals, have unrealistic expectations from relationships, or are still in their flighty stage, not going to settle down... or never will.... and yes, some just don't understand men at all... and expect men to be women... and that just ain't gonna happen.
I know that honestly, if I found myself trapped in midtown manhattan and had to find a bride, I'd probably be going after the first or second generation immigrants... they still have some sense about them when it comes to the relationship between men and women... and not fully corrupted by consumerism and greed... and frankly haven't been with everyone and their brother during the "wild days" and now want to settle down.
Then you are kind not to involve someone else. Bravo to you.
Bump!
But there are good, kind, sensible, loving American women too, as well as American men.
Oh I know... they are out there, finding them in a dense urban setting is a rather difficult task.... which is what my last paragraph is about. Far easier to find in more rural areas in my experience.
That certainly true.
No, actually you said:
More likely: I'm selfish and unwilling to compromise even on minor things.
"Merely" would mean "and unwilling to compromise even on minor things" didn't follow "I'm selfish." No one is hard pressed to find a value judgment there. What are you, a wannabe lawyer?
...and that you were literally "betting the farm?"
Indeed.
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