Here's a clue Andrew, and since apparently you know the Bible so well, liberalism and all of its beliefs, you know, Godly things such as:
Ripping living babies from the womb after "Osterizing" them [read hacking them into tiny bits];
Favoring the killing of innocent adults for whatever reasons are politically expedient;
Stripping references to God and Judeo-Christian morals out of every semblance of American life;
Favoring leniency towards people that destroy life, you know, Hussein, violent felons and child molestors, et al.;
Desiring to give equal credence to gods and religions when Jesus Christ himself stated that he and he alone was the only way to the Father! Or haven't you read that one quite yet. I realize that it's in the lesser read four gospels.
Paul, you know, the author of the vast majority of the NT after the gospels, also says that if anyone will not work, then neither should he eat. (2 Thess. 3) Yet, liberalism takes the opposite view. Food for all regardless of how lazy or unwilling to work they may be.
How many of those things do you think that Jesus Christ and the Living God, you know, the pivotal figures of Christianity, agree with there Andrew?!
There's more, but that should be more than enough to tie up your mind in coming up with more ridiculous excuses as answers to them.
And since Conservatisim is the antithesis of liberalism, and frankly, built on Judeo-Christian values, that yes, Christ would be much more inline with Conservative ideology!
Maybe he was more like this radical Republican
"Let my people go" and all that... But that was Moses, huh?
Actually, Jewish law in biblical times allowed people to eat their fill out of any person's field. Pocketing food and walking away was considered stealing, but eating was not.
Jesus supported this idea as well:
"Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?" -Matthew 6:26