We ended up putting her in our local public school for many complicated reasons (one of which was her sister who at a very young age showed evidence of brilliance and I was honestly too afraid to teach her and possibly screw her up)
The schools have worked with us at times and not at others. She bonded with a few teachers who are, in my opinion, saints here on earth. There were a couple that were rotten. She's going to college this fall at a small, private school with a whole lot of support. I've never been this nervous and you can believe I'll do what I can from 4 hours away, but the time has come for her to be on her own. Tons of deep breaths and prayers--and my husband says a drink now and then won't hurt.
Thank you for sharing your experience. We all make the mistake of thinking we know the answers to things that don't concern us directly. There shouldn't be a "conservative" approach to an illness. Just a medical and human one.