There is nothing wrong with deciding not to have kids but how can you say you haven't missed out on something, if you don't know what it's like? Sometimes , I felt like I missed out on the fun of going off to a university . (I married young and finished school at local colleges). When it came down to making a choice though, I chose not to go to medical school and never regretted it. Sometimes, honestly though, I think I would have finished school first if I had it to do all over again because life was very hard but knowing what I know, there is no way I would not have wanted children. If I hadn't though then I would probably also be saying , "I didn't miss anything" because I wouldn't have known what it was like.
Your post 75 was most interesting and I think I have a reply but things are fuzzing over (it's late), so I'll reply tomorrow.
Your entire post is interesting but it's the first sentence that attracts most of my attention. I think au contraire that one can know what he's missed and not regret missing it. To use an extreme example, you can see real footage of men in war and not regret being there in the thick of battle.
But to use a more appropriate example: I have seen people (mostly my four siblings) who had children and saw up close and personal what they underwent by the presence of children: the noise, food messes, pleas for money, fights between siblings, but more importantly, the emotional stress and fights between the husband and wife caused by discipline problems and financial problems.
This simply reinforced my teenage decision to avoid having children.
It also likely saved my life. You see, I am a person who is under stress almost all the time. Built-in defect. An example: when I was in my 20's I was a radio announcer and DJ with some talent. But after just four years this inherent stress I have caused me to literally lose my voice: I developed a form of stuttering, unable to get out the words. End of radio career.
Now if this could happen can you imagine what the stress of having the years-long responsibility of taking care of children, combined with an inherited heart defect (see earlier post), would have done. My wife would have been a widow years ago.
To return to my "thesis", I could also have been a lawyer (qualified for law school and all) but once I made a full investigation and found out what law school really required, I declined. Again, I likely avoided an early death.
It's just an assertion but I think that one can just think about what may have been and not do it, he can feel sure that he has not missed "anything" in the sense that what he missed was not worth it. Anyway, that's the way I see it.
Ive been married for 16 years and havent any children. Its a decision that I regret. I feel that if I had children I would have regretted it more however so I didnt have any. Its hard work and selfless sacrifice to raise children, at least when my mother raised eight of us thats how I saw it. There are many rewards for having kids, to look into their eyes when they say I love you either explicitly or implicitly has got to be incredibly wonderful. The pride a parent must feel when their child grows and overcomes obstacles must also be very satisfying. My wish is that other Christians would quit ostracizing me for not being fruitful and multiplying when they only start the equation and then stop it after one or two offspring. I applaud and support those who wish to raise children. I just think the human race did a pretty good job of following the command to be fruitful for now although we will probably end up in the hundreds of billions before its all over. The world doesnt really need me to have any more does it?