"I've never understood how anybody can get worked up over our baptisms for the dead."
Religious Jews think you're nuts and rude (disrespectful of the dead) for doing this.
But mostly harmless.
That said, it does rekindle the insult of forced conversions (e.g., Spanish Inquisition and other forced assimilations (e.g., what Hannukka is all about, albeit with the Greeks).
Secular Jews are just generally anti-anyone religious.
Me, my opinion falls under "mostly harmless."
But if we're nuts, then where's the harm? Nobody living is being forced to do so say anything they don't believe in.
And, even for those of us who believe in baptism for the dead, we believe it is up to the person for whom the ordinance is being performed to accept or reject it in the next life. Therefore, even if you believe our ordinances are effective, there is no effect if the person doesn't wish it to have effect.
Therefore, it is not forced conversion, even of the dead, and even if you believe that the ordinances we perform actually work.
That's my point.
It seems to me that anyone who can get worked up over this is just looking for something to get worked up over.
One way or the other -- believer or unbeliever -- nut or not -- it is harmless, exactly as you said.