Cost of burying slain child adds to parents' trauma

Sacramento Bee ^ | January 11, 2007 | By Jocelyn Wiener - Bee Staff Writer

[kawaii]

Cost of burying slain child adds to parents' trauma By Jocelyn Wiener - Bee Staff Writer Last Updated 12:27 am PST Thursday, January 11, 2007 Story appeared in MAIN NEWS section, Page A1

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Asia Williams, left, comforts Kwanay Smith, during a memorial service in 2004 for their friend ShaTavia Westbrook at Florin High School. Westbrook was killed in a drive-by shooting. Some experts say insurance can ease the pain of a grieving family that struggles to pay for the funeral. Sacramento Bee file, 2004/Carl Costas

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At 15 years old, ShaTavia Westbrook had a long list of things going right in her life: She was an honor roll student at Florin High and a star on her school basketball team. She was so inquisitive, her aunt, Charmona Lloyd, nicknamed her "Knowledge."

Then, just past midnight on June 22, 2003: the unimaginable. As Westbrook sat in a car outside a middle school graduation party, someone fired shots. A bullet hit Westbrook in the back.

Because no one predicted the death of the vibrant, friendly girl, no one thought to insure her life. Without an insurance policy to cover her funeral, Westbrook's family scrambled for money.

They received help from a state program for victims of violence. Her basketball teammates held a carwash. But the funeral stretched the family financially.

In the years since, her aunt has become a vocal proponent of life insurance for young people. Lloyd's spoken about it over the loudspeaker at a youth football game, at church and at anti-violence rallies. She tells her clients at Primerica Financial Services. Consider setting aside a monthly sum, she suggests, in case you, too, need to bury a child.

[Tax-chick]

her aunt has become a vocal proponent of life insurance for young people

It's particularly useful to start a whole-life policy when they're little, because by the time they are adults, the policy will pay for itself.

[goldstategop]

A life insurance policy will cover murders and natural deaths. The most draining aspect of a loved one's death are funeral expenses. They can easily exceed $10,000. Maybe more with a full blown fancy commemoration of the deceased. I've been there.

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus

[kawaii]

A lot of policies now have a rider for like 10k of insurance on every child. This can be converted to I beleive 50k of 20 year term without proof of insurability at age 25.

Very smart if your family has a history of diabeties or similar things since if a child comes down with those it'd make it very hard to get insurance as an adult.

[svcw]

How on earth can a funeral be 10K? I helped bury my twin grandsons, we bought a small plot and plain casket then had a ceremony at the grave site, the family and friends went to dinner after words and it could not have been more than 2K total. What do you do with 10K.

[goldstategop]

Where was that? When I buried my father two years ago, expenses came to roughly $6,000. And that was a very simple funeral with a plain pine casket.

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelologus

[ninergold3]

I helped bury my twin grandsons

My heart goes out to you and your family. I can't even imagine your pain.

I do agree with your post. I've told my family that when I go I want to be cremated and have my ashes scattered somewhere pretty. Then I want my family and friends to have a HUGE celebration of life in my honor. I want there to be country music, laughter and margaritas!

[Centurion2000]

Then, just past midnight on June 22, 2003: the unimaginable. As Westbrook sat in a car outside a middle school graduation party,

Not that breaking curfew should have the death penalty, but what the hell was she doing out after midnight?

[Nathan Zachary]

You far better off to start a 401 K type of savings plan for your children. Not only can you use it as a deduction while you are contributing to it, but if you buy a collage plan type, withdrawls from it are tax free for collage costs. There would be more than enough money in the plan for a funeral, and if it's not used for collage, then they have a damn good retirement fund already in place if you choose to give it to them. If not, you can keep it for yourself.
It would be A LOT of money by the time they hit collage age.
No matter what, it's far far better than any insurance plan.

[kawaii]

Good question to be sure.

[kawaii]

For the cost of whole life you could probably get some term insurance AND start a 401k for your child and beat the lous 1.something percent returns cash value policies typically offer.

[svcw]

Santa Barbara CA. We were able to bury the boys together, which was a blessing. Maybe there was a reduction in the cost because they were so young, but I can not remember.

[Nathan Zachary]

You can get roasted and toasted ( prayer ceremony with small gathering at the hall with booze and sandwiches) for about $1000-$1500 w/ a nice urn for ashes.

But you are right, low priced funerals are getting up there in price, much of it is casket anf tomb costs. You can rent one however, and be buried in a real cheap one.

[Dianna]

How on earth can a funeral be 10K? I helped bury my twin grandsons, we bought a small plot and plain casket then had a ceremony at the grave site, the family and friends went to dinner after words and it could not have been more than 2K total. What do you do with 10K.

Very recently, a service with cremation for my son was just under $5000. We did have insurance, so it was covered and then some. I have no idea what the costs would be to inter his ashes in some fashion. We haven't quite gotten to handling that yet.

[kalee]

Fancy casket, limos for the family to ride in to and from the graveside, etc. etc. etc.

[PAR35]

The most draining aspect of a loved one's death are funeral expenses. They can easily exceed $10,000.

Depends on how big a party you want and how expensive a casket you buy. Go with a creamation and a memorial service, and you should be under $1000. Many churches don't charge for funerals/memorials. If you want a marker, find a local park district that will let you donate a tree and place a memorial marker.

[svcw]

I have told my family the same thing. I want my ashes scattered in the Pacific Ocean off the coast in Santa Barbara, CA. I have also told them not to pull the plug, I want to linger until there is no money left. ;-)
About the pain, as a side note not only my own but the pain of my daughter and son-in-law. I honestly thought we would never get through it but we survived. We now have two fantastic grandchildren, a boy and girl..a blessing more than I an put into words. Every year we celibate the birth of those twin boys, theirs was a short but incredibly valued and enlightening life.

[Porterville]

Her family should sue the world... that'd fix everything... because everybody deserves free stuff.

[Bluepool]

Historically, a funeral and cemetery expenses have been about 1/2 the price of an average new car. Today those cost are approaching $10,000

[newcthem]

As long as California insists on giving free health insurance to children of illegals, perhaps they can provide at least funeral benefits for American children.