"Good morning class, today in our first day of psychology, we'll discuss global warming, climate change if you will, and will continue with this topic until each of you socialists in training truly believe it exists"..
"The grading scale is:
A = agree 100% with your professor.
B = agree 100% with your professor but don't openly worship your professor.
C = agree 100% with your professor but don't snarl when you mention Republicans, Christians, conservatives, the rich, or any other group that your professor has designated as slime balls.
D = disagree with your professor on anything but your parents are either big-time donors to the university or attorneys who will sue if you fail.
F = disagree with your professor and prove that you are a Republican, Christian, conservative slime ball who does belong at an elite school like Duke.