Some photo caption jokes just write themselves.
Posted on 02/17/2007 1:15:37 AM PST by JohnHuang2
The perjury trial of I. Lewis Libby Jr., former top aide to Vice President Dick Cheney, has drawn every major news organization in the country to the federal courthouse in Washington. But none has fielded a bigger team — or was more openly crushed by the defense decision this week not to put Mr. Cheney and Mr. Libby on the stand Continues...
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Patrick Fitzgerald: Dude, where's my case?
One of the central issues of the Libby trial which has been put into really sharp focus is how profoundly full of it Patrick Fitzgerald is. Also, what perfect cellmates Fitzgerald and Mike Nifong would make. This farce of a trial proves that people can have fuzzy memories. Even clown Fitzgerald has a fuzzy memory -- like when he forgot what he was supposed to be investigating. Fitzgerald was told who told Robert Novak that CIA pencil-pusher Valerie Plame was Joe Wilson's wife as soon as his 'investigation' began. Five minutes later, he forgot it was Richard Armitage. He then forgot what he was supposed to investigate. So FitzMagoo launches a 3-year big bucks boondoggle probe to probe what he couldn't remember and charged Libby with not remembering things that didn't happen. It's a trial of Libby's memory. If convicted on all counts, Libby's memory faces 30 years.
Per newly released trial documents, this whole thing got started early in 2002, not with Cheney requesting info about possible Iraqi efforts to buy uranium from Africa, but with the DIA which reported Iraq may have signed a deal to buy uranium from Niger, but the CIA, which dislikes the DIA, wanted to shoot down DIA's report, so CIA desk jockey Valerie Plame gives her husband Joe Wilson the gig but Joe Wilson said his wife had no role in his gig because it was Cheney who sent him to Niger but Cheney denies that because Joe Wilson already got the gig before Cheney got briefed on DIA's report, plus a Senate Intelligence Committee report says Valerie Plame, not Cheney, gave the gig to Joe Wilson who says Rove told Novak about Joe Wilson's wife but Novak says it wasn't Rove because Fitzgerald told Novak it was Armitage because Armitage told Fitzgerald he told Woodward and told Novak who told Rove who says Matthew Cooper asked about Joe Wilson's wife while Marc Grossman told Libby who allegedly told Judith Miller (who didn't write an article about it) that government documents plainly show Valerie Plane sent Joe Wilson to Niger and that she wasn't covert, which shows:
* Joe Wilson's bimbo wife wasn't covered by the "Intelligence Identities Protection Act" since the law wasn't meant for pencil-pushers trying to find 'make-work' for their husbands. Incidentally, bimbo's job was "analyzing" WMDs. (Oh, no! I broke a nail looking for WMD folders!)
* There was no underlying "crime" -- showing why you don't appoint prosecutors with Alzheimer's to investigate cases.
* Valerie Plame's job at CIA was not classified, so Libby had not "leaked" any "classified" information -- which explains why he isn't being lauded as a hero at the New York Times.
* Libby had no motive to "cover up" since there was no "crime" to "cover up" -- though he didn't help matters by not stuffing evidence in his freezer or letting top secret documents leap into his pants and socks and underwear, which would have prompted Mike Nifong Fitzgerald to charge the documents with sexual assault.
* Fitzgerald's moronic theory is that Libby was the point man in a White House "campaign" to "discredit" Joe Wilson by telling two reporters that Plame got Wilson the gig, but that Libby then forgot to mention Plame in interviews with media hotshots Bob Woodward, Walter Pincus, David Sanger, Robert Novak, Glenn Kessler, Evan Thomas, etc. -- right in the middle of Fitzgerald's mythical "campaign" (circa summer '03). All would have been useful for Libby to get the story out, but Libby forgot to mention Plame. If Libby were this much a no-talent airhead, he'd have swept the Grammys on Sunday.
* Even if bimbo was undercover, Fitzgerald would still have to prove that (a) Libby insanely believed Secret Agent Bimbo's job was classified, even after seeing the INR memo Grossman procured for him which spells out Plame was just a pencil-pusher and (b) that Libby forgot he wasn't the idiot who first talked to Novak. Armitage finally admitted he told Novak and Woodward about Joe Wilson's wife, but that he did it by mistake. He wasn't charged because Valerie Plame wasn't undercover and because the law clearly says, 'It is a defense to a prosecution under this law to tell Fitzgerald you oppose BushHitler's Iraq war.'
* Since Plame wasn't undercover, there was no way to "retaliate" against gasbag Joe Wilson, and there was nothing ghastly or horrific to "cover up" (except for images of Joe Wilson), which is how you end up with a "case" which boils down to: Libby didn't do it, but Libby didn't tell me precisely when he didn't do it and Libby could not have forgotten when he didn't do it, so obviously Libby is guilty.
Liberals continually smeared the CIA as a pack of cocaine traffickers and murderers, then the Plame affair came along, and the CIA became virtuous, moral and very, very angelic. If Libby is acquitted, the CIA, by force of habit, resumes being a pack of cocaine traffickers and murderers.
The only crime committed in this case was appointing Fitzgerald. Fitzgerald charged Libby with perjury (lying about not knowing exactly when he didn't commit a crime) and impeding his investigation -- which, given the competent way Fitzgerald hasn't been running his investigation, it's a wonder Fitzgerald didn't indict himself. Maybe it's just that his witnesses needed time to magically get their stories straight:
* Tim Russert first told an FBI agent he couldn't rule out mentioning Plame in a telephone exchange with Libby on July 8, 2003, then changed his story for the trial, claiming it's "impossible" because he now remembers he only found out about Plame from Novak's column, even though everybody and her sister at NBC knew Plame's identity before Novak's column, including colleague Andrea Mitchell who said on Oct. '03 that Plame "was widely known among those of us who cover the intelligence community." Bolstering his credibility, Russert submitted a false affidavit to the grand jury to keep from complying with a subpoena to testify about his telephone exchange with Libby, omitting in it that he had already talked to an FBI agent about his telephone exchange with Libby. In response to Russert's lying to the grand jury, Fitzgerald indicts Libby.
* Judith Miller told the court she interviewed Libby three times in the summer of '03 and that he talked about Joe Wilson's wife. She says she vividly recalls her first meeting with Libby, on June 23, 2003. She gave a vivid description of that meeting, at the Old Executive Office Building, going into great detail about Libby's demeanor, what Libby told her, how Libby felt -- that he appeared obsessed with Joe Wilson and his trip to Africa. Her recollection of that June 23 meeting was so vivid, she vividly forgot to mention it during her first grand jury appearance. She just forgot about it. She couldn't remember it during the 85 days she spent in jail -- only when they let her out did all her memories magically return! Defense lawyer William Jeffress brought all this out during cross. As for the other meetings, Judy the rocket scientist admitted she only dimly recalls those and it looks as if she only dimly recalls how to make out her own notes. Her memory is even worse than Fitzgerald's. She was destroyed on the witness stand.
Instead of railroading Libby, it looks as if Libby's scooter ran over the prosecution's "case" so many times, all that was left was a pitiful stain on the ground. And the defense isn't finished yet. Stay tuned!
Anyway, that's...
My Two Cents...
"JohnHuang2"
Have yourselves a great weekend -- God bless!
BUMPERS.
JH2, not that I disbelieve your analysis of the FitzMess, but at a "betting site" the chances of a conviction have gone up as the prosecution closed its case. At least one conviction finding against Libby is seen as Bid:72.0, Ask: 84.0. Perhaps it is time to make some money.
Thanks for the analysis, which is really funny....but now I have a headache!
Great summary and analysis.
Well worth two cents!
Some photo caption jokes just write themselves.
Terrific! Perhaps you should sell that to the defense team as their closing argument. BTTT
BTTT
Who reimburses Libby for his legal costs? Who reimburses the taxpayers for this fiasco? Indeed when does Fitznuts go to jail for wrongful prosecution?
Great summation. Unfortunately, though, this is not has not been a "non-case". It served as an effective bludgeon to help discredit the war in Iraq, and provided the media with a concrete tool to cast the administration in a Watergate-like visage.
Damage was done long before the verdict. And that was the whole point.
Sliced and diced! Bravo!
great analysis!
But what about the matching Valentine shirts the jurors all wore to show their love for the judge?
JH dos, if you're not writing for a living, you should be. Another great one.
Great!! Bump!
BravoZulu John... Scooters lawyers should read it verbatim in their closing argument!!!
What fabulous writing!!! I could actually understand how ABSURD this whole show trial has been!! THANK YOU!! Libby is still going to prison....it's a DC JURY!
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