When seated next to some of these characters, every passenger is advised to have on hand a large bag of pork rinds or pork scratchings, clearly labeled. If allowed, also a can or two of pork brains in milk gravy. Make sure you offer some to your seatmates. When they decline, say "I don't blame you. If I eat too many, they give me gas." Finish the whole bag, and burp if you can. Wipe your mouth on the sleeve closest to them, then play the "hog the armrest" game.
If you have a laptop, be sure to play some Porky Pig cartoons. Or use a picture of a pet pig for your desktop wallpaper. Or download Joe Cartoon's "Osama Sissy Fight" from someplace like http://www.reupload.com/uploads/osamabox.zip and play it in explorer. It's fun. Or get a good picture of the World Trade Center and just stare at it the entire flight.
The other day, I saw a cute little LED flashlight inside a little pink pig, and it grunted. That would be fun to play with to avoid boredom, or to entertain a child. If you are a sports fan, pick up a copy of "Pigskin: The Early Years of Pro Football". Buy a new pair of pigskin gloves, and try to stretch them in while aboard. If you get odd stares, tell 'em you're "just breaking in a new pair - real pigskin". How are you to know, or care?
If it's a meal flight, always order a Kosher meal, just in case. The when they see you have something different, tell 'em you "always order the Kosher stuff" because, nudge nudge, wink wink, "you never know if there's pork in the regular meals".
There are many ways to while away the time on a flight.
Wow!
Sir, I just saw your tag-line, with sorrow I extend my condolences and prayers to you and your family. I say this with tears, may the Lord continue to comfort you on the loss of your dear precious son.
Nice one! And be sure to wait until your suspicious seatmate has finished his meal before confiding your doubts about porkiness.