[Stoat]

Folks (such as myself) banished to the smoking patios seem to have more fun than the patrons cooped-up inside (they don’t want to associate with the dirty smokers). I attribute the jocularity to being outside and enjoying the elements.

There is something absolutely delightful about spending time with a vivacious young lady under the warm glow of an outdoor space heater in the evening....almost as nice as a campfire, and far nicer than straining to hear her sultry voice over the din of the other patrons and the blaring TV.  If pubs are banned from providing them, perhaps customers will be allowed to bring their own portable units?

Vivacious young lass #1:  "Which table would you like to sit at?"

Vivacious young lass #2 :  "Ooooh....that one! He's got to be a Conservative...he's brought his own space heater!"

[goarmy]

“...far nicer than straining to hear her sultry voice over the din of the other patrons and the blaring TV.”

YAHTZEE!