Iraq - U.S.-Iraqi forces raid lollipop factory

Associated Press (excerpt) ^ | June 12, 2007 | Kim Gamel

[knarf]

Well I left Kentucky back in 49.

And I went to Detroit workin on an assembly line
The first year they had me puttin wheels on Caddillacs
Every day I’d watch them beauties roll by
and sometimes id hang my head and cry
Cause i always wanted me one that was long and black.

One day I devised myself a plan that should be the envy of most any man
Id sneak it out of there in a lunch box in my hand
Now, gettin caught meant gettin fired
But I figured I’d have it all by the time I retired
And I’d have me a car worth at least a hundered grand

(CHORUS)
I’d get it one piece at a time
And it wouldnt cost me a dime
You’ll know it’s me whe I come throught your town
I’m gonna ride around in style
I’m gonna drive everybody wild
Cause I’ll have the only one ther is around

So the very next day when I punched in
With my big lunch box and with help from my friends
I left that day with a lunch box full of gears
I’ve never considered myself a thief
But GM wouldn’t miss just one little piece
Especially if I strung it out over several years
The first day I got me a fuel pump
And the next day I got me an engine and a trunk
Then i got me a transmission and all the chrome

The little things I could get in my big lunch box
Like nuts and bolts and all 4 shocks
But the big stuff we snuck out in my buddies mobile home

Now, up to now, my plan went all right
Till we tried to put it all together one night
And thats when we noticed that somethin was definitely wrong
The transmission was a 53
And the motor turned out to be a 73
And when we tried to put in the bolts all the holes were gone
So we drilled it out so that it would fit
And with a little bit of help from an adapter kit
We had that engine runnin just like a song

Now the headlights they was another sight
We had 2 on the left and one on the right
But when we pulled out the switch all three of em come on

The back end looked kinda funny too
But we put it together and when we got through
Well thats when we noticed that we only had one tail fin
About that time my wife walked out
And I could see in her eyes that she had her doubts
But she opened the door and said “Honey, take me for a spin.”

So we drove up town just to get the tags
And I headed right on down main drag
And I could hear everybody laughing for blocks around
But up there at the court house they didn’t laugh
Cause to type it up it took the whole staff
And when they got through the title weighed 60 pounds

(CHORUS)

Uh,yeah,Red-rider,this is the Cottonmouth in the sycho-billy-Cadillac,come on
This is the Cottonmouth and negatory on the cost on this machine here
Red-rider
You might say I right up to the factory and picked it up, it was chaper
that way
What model is it?
It’s a 49,50,51,52,53,54,55,56,57,58,59 automobile
It’s a 60,61,62,63,64,65,66,67,68,69,70 automobile

[Fiji Hill]

ROTFLOL!

[knarf]

Old Johnny Cash tune.

[P.O.E.]

We must allow the Lullabye League time to complete their inspections.