Senator Ernie Chambers
Posted on 09/17/2007 2:23:12 PM PDT by My Favorite Headache
State Senator Ernie Chambers Sues God Chambers says its to prove a point about frivolous lawsuits.
UPDATED: 3:04 pm CDT September 17, 2007
OMAHA, Neb -- State Senator Ernie Chambers is suing God. He says it to prove a point about frivolous lawsuits.
Chambers says senators periodically have offered bills prohibiting the filing of certain types of suits. He says his main objection is the constitution requires that the doors to the courthouse be open to all. Chambers said, "Thus anybody can file a lawsuit against anybody - even God."
Chambers said he decided to file this lawsuit after a suit was filed in early September in federal court against Lancaster County Judge Jeffre Cheuvront. He's the judge who was hearing a sexual assault case, where the woman wants to use the words "rape and victim" during her testimony.
Chambers lawsuit, which was filed on Friday in Douglas County Court, seeks a permanent injunction ordering God to cease certain harmful activities and the making of terroristic threats.
The lawsuit admits God goes by all sorts of alias, names, titles and designations and it also recognizes the fact that the defendant is “Omnipresent”.
In the lawsuit Chambers says he’s tried to contact God numerous times, “Plaintiff, despite reasonable efforts to effectuate personal service upon Defendant (“Come out, come out, wherever you are”) has been unable to do so.”
The suit also requests that the court given the “peculiar circumstances” of this case waive personal service. It says being Omniscient, the plaintiff assumes God will have actual knowledge of the action.
The lawsuit accuses God “of making and continuing to make terroristic threats of grave harm to innumerable persons, including constituents of Plaintiff who Plaintiff has the duty to represent.”
It says God has caused, “fearsome floods, egregious earthquakes, horrendous hurricanes, terrifying tornadoes, pestilential plagues, ferocious famines, devastating droughts, genocidal wars, birth defects, and the like.”
The suit also says God has caused, “calamitous catastrophes resulting in the wide-spread death, destruction and terrorization of millions upon millions of the Earth’s inhabitants including innocent babes, infants, children, the aged and infirm without mercy or distinction.”
Chambers also says God “has manifested neither compassion nor remorse, proclaiming that Defendant “will laugh” when calamity comes.
Chambers asks for the court to grant him a summary judgement. He says as an alternative, he wants the judge to set a date for a hearing as “expeditiously” as possible and enter a permanent injunction enjoining God from engaging in the types of deleterious actions and the making of terroristic threats described in the lawsuit.
Take him out back and give him a tune up for wasting time and tax dollars.
What’s the point? How do you serve God with a complaint. If they can’t find him, they can’t sue him. It won’t even get a docket number. It’ll just linger. It’s really, really an inane and Dada-esque idea.
In other news, God has filed a countersuit ...
Note to self - don’t stand too close to Chambers due to probable incoming lighting strikes.
He should sue God for not providing him with a working brain. He’d have a better chance of winning that one.
Does he have a point besides the one on his pin head?
One day Ernie Chambers will be on trial in God’s court.
Hope and pray his defense attorney is Jesus.
“It says God has caused, “fearsome floods, egregious earthquakes, horrendous hurricanes, terrifying tornadoes, pestilential plagues, ferocious famines, devastating droughts, genocidal wars, birth defects, and the like.””
And baldness. Don’t forget baldness.
Push him a little bit and he’ll blame Bush and the Jews for 9/11.
Talk about sovereign immunity ... !
I guess he's proven frivolous lawsuits can be filed. Has he proven they can be acted upon?
I wish they gave a bit more background info on his concern.
It seems to me that suing God at a time when God owns property in your state could be lucrative.
We studied a case like this in law school. A suit was filed against Satan (and his minions, as I recall). The judge wrote a thoughtful order tossing out the suit, citing a lack of jurisdiction (you have not proved the defendant is situated within the jurisdiction of this court, even for service of process). I wish I had the link.
Perhaps the Judge could dispatch a disfavored deputy to the hoary netherworld in an attempt to serve process.
We note that the plaintiff has failed to include with his complaint the required form of instructions for the United States Marshal for directions as to service of process.
Hey, it makes almost as much sense as a judge allowing unnamed illegal aliens sue a municipality.
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