[Philistone]

Can I bring him the hemlock? Please? Pretty PLEASE?

[shankbear]

This buttwipe is a legend in his own mind. Time to test fire some new hardware near his country when his plane departs Iranian airspace. WOOOOOOOOOOOPS!!!!! Splash.

[ConorMacNessa]

He’s more like the Attila the Hun of the millenium.

[I see my hands]

Dibs! I'm Julius Caesar.

[VOA]

Iran: Ahmadinejad is 'Socrates of third millenium', says president's office

I am tired.
BUT, I think that my initial mis-read of the title might be closer
to the truth (although I think it still insults Socrates):

"Iran: Ahmadinejad is 'Socrates of third CENTURY', says president's office

[Jaysun]

This little sawed off unibrow is going to poke his head out of the wrong window one day soon.

[neodad]

I thought that the honor belonged to Shaquille O’Neal?

[sageb1]

I thought this was Scrappleface.

[penelopesire]

ROTFLOL!!

loved this part:

“Oliver Stone should visit Iran and familiarise himself with the reality of the country, before beginning his documentary of Ahmadinejad,” said Shamaghdari.”

Don’t worry Shamaghdari...I am sure Hollywood will treat Ahmanutjob very kindly and supportively in their upcoming documentary! (rolling eyes)

[mylife]

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable.

Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could think you under the table.

David Hume could out-consume
Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel, [some versions have ‘Schopenhauer and Hegel’]

And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.

There’s nothing Nietzsche couldn’t teach ya
‘Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed.

John Stuart Mill, of his own free will,
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.

Plato, they say, could stick it away—
Half a crate of whisky every day.

Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle.
Hobbes was fond of his dram,

And René Descartes was a drunken fart.
‘I drink, therefore I am.’

Yes, Socrates, himself, is particularly missed,
A lovely little thinker,
But a bugger when he’s pissed.

[nickcarraway]

Waiting for hemlock...

[Popman]

I promise you, when I saw the title, my first thought was "Great, an Onion satire article"

[TenthAmendmentChampion]

Is the role of Napoleon taken?

[Gritty]

[firebrand]

[firebrand]

In your ear, Mahmoud!

[AlphaOneAlpha]

The sooner one of his own countrymen puts a bullet in his scrambled brain, the better off Iran and the world will be.

[struggle]

get the hemlock!

[Polonius]

It’s nice that he’s so modest about it.

[Fudd Fan]

I’ll bet that translates as “sockpuppet” instead.