Posted on 09/24/2007 7:34:28 AM PDT by yoe
Potfry at (The Nose on Your Face) claims to have obtained an advance copy of some of the queries submitted by Columbia University students for Iranian President Ahmadinejad, who visits the campus today as part of his continuing worldwide goodwill tour:
Dear Esteemed Leader:
It seems the explosives you are supplying to the freedom fighters in Iraq aren’t killing and maiming the illegally occupying American soldiers at the rate we’d hoped for. Have you considered switching to a device with a greater air blast and superior fragment projection? Or, failing that, perhaps taking a page from our brothers in the Palestinian resistance and filling the IEDs with ball bearings, nails, and thumb tacks?
Oh Mighty Prince of Persia:
First, let me apologize for those mindless Neo-con (talk about redundant!) protests outside. It’s a sad day indeed when the benevolent leader of a major world power is pelted with Slurpee cups and greeted with cries of “Hey cabbie!” Furthermore, I really felt the “Goat Whisperer” signs were beyond the pale.
My question stems from a recent discussion we had in my Womyn’s Studies Class. A freshman suggested that Iran’s policies toward women could be construed as borderline intolerant, citing the recent death by stoning of an Iranian woman for adultery. I quickly pointed out the faulty, blatantly ethnocentric thinking inherent in this student’s remark. My question is this: in this supposedly “enlightened” day and age, why are so many people still so intolerant of different cultures? And please don’t give me the “He’s just a freshman” line. I was a freshman like three semesters ago and was never a raging xenophobe like that Hitler-youth wannabe.
______________________________________________________ Dearest Sultan:
First, I want to apologize for the so-called lizards at the Zionist blog Little Green Footballs who have taken to calling you “DinnerJacket.” That their ignorance and intolerance extends even to their fashion sensibility should not surprise us. The enlightened among, us, however, can appreciate that a Members Only jacket never goes out of style.
My question is this: many BusHitler supporters conveniently believe that, in your famous “World Without Zionism” speech, you said that “Israel should be wiped from the map.” Last week, in my Tibetan Film and TV class, the professor told us that academic scholars have properly translated the phrase as, “Live long and prosper my Hebrew brethren.” Clearly, this translation is more in keeping with Iran’s great tradition of tolerance. But I remain perplexed: why is it that Israel wants to kill Arab babies?
_______________________________________________________ Mighty Monarch of Mesopotamia:
It is a pleasure to have a real, live revolutionary speak at our humble school. I know many Rethuglicans have put enormous pressure on Columbia to prevent you from speaking. To this university’s credit, they haven’t backed down. The free exchange of ideas-especially unpopular ones-must be allowed to continue in this country; especially in the halls of academe. I am looking forward to hearing what you have to say. I already know it will be a quantum leap ahead of the vile, racist Minutemen speech that we had to shut down last year. I would like to know if you will be coming out with a line of t-shirts similar to Che Guevera’s? I know like a hundred dudes who would totally buy one. Keep it in mind.
_______________________________________________________ President Ahmadinejad,
Two-part question: First, is it difficult to break into your line of work? Second, are you currently accepting interns?
______________________________________________________
I wouldn’t be surprised if those really were some of the questions.
Is you, or is you not the 13th Imam ?
/sarcasm
What do you plan on doing with those 72 olives?
As the 13th Imam, why should I come and live in a country the is so patently doing the work of Shaitan? Steadfastly working to kill off those whom the Lord, himself, chose is the surest sign that one is in the thrall of evil.
So, again, why should I, the 13th Imam, come to your Allah-forsaken land of evil and iniquity?
How bout asking where he stands on homosexuals getting married? Just let him say one word against the sexual deviants and he will be out of there.
Every Iranian in the US with Diplomatic Immunity, should be arrested and sent to Gitmo for 444 days.
“If I were locked in a room with a person who is loudly screaming that he’s going to blow my head off as he loads a revolver, would I be justified in using any means available to defend myself?”
I would ask him “Why do you, a dictator known to harbor terrorism, support al-Qaida, sell weapons to the insurgents in Iraq, deny the Holocaust, insist on nuking Israel off the map, and threaten the US every day, insist on speaking to American college students and visiting Ground Zero, the site of two building that, by the help of your cronies, are now a pile of rubble?”
In a way I wish I was at Columbia today. I would loooove to ask that question. I just hope they won’t taser me...
when you stated that you wished to lay a wreath at the site of the WTC attacks, was it to memorialize the 3,000 innocent people that were killed, or to honor the 19 terrorists that killed them?
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