A co-worker at my part-time job is a man-to-woman transsexual - uses the ladies’ room and all.
I have a horrible time not calling him “sir” to his face because for me, the chromosome test is the ultimate arbiter.
Well, for all my bravado, I don’t think I’d really be able to call him “sir” to his face either. It would just be confrontational and rude. I’d probably try to avoid labels, like they used to do with Pat. “For . . . Pat’s a jolly good . . . person. . . .”
In the Navy I learned to look for an adam's apple and man-hands. Before leaving the bar, a "Crocodile Dundee" style "package check" is called for. Or so I was told....
I was also told that in some areas of Thailand, the women that look really good, they're all men.