Most excellent rant, again...
However, I must point out that"porking his mistress" is a redundant turn of phrase..
in that the noun presumes the verb...
Oh, yeah...Merry Christmas!!!
Dang, I guess I better refrain from my fav then - "shagging his side-b*tch" ;-)
Merry Christmas!!!!!
Excuse me for butting in but since the subject is Rooty, not necessarily.
Considering his 'over active libido' (per judi) he could've been 'porking' a Blow-up Doll add in his (cough) morals, it could be a small Farm Animal. Neither of which would be categorized as a 'mistress'.
Ergo, "porking his mistress" would be correct.