Posted on 01/09/2008 5:29:40 AM PST by Mr. Brightside
Not too concerned. In retrospect, with God’s help, we did a pretty good job with her. She’s overly mature for her age and has never given us a moment’s worry when she’s been out.
Lack of driving experience is still a risk factor. Good luck to all of you!
I put her through the ringer while she was learning to drive. Made her drive off the road and save the car, drive at high speed cross the state (80+mph) and drive the PA turnpike (she’s still mad at me for that)
We also had to make run from Michigan to Georgia and back over two days so she learned how to drive distances with just enough sleep deprivation to make it fun.
Thats a good one. I am going to remember it!
My oldest who is now 28, stills tells these two stories to his younger siblings.
He once told me that this is a democracy and that I couldn’t just impose rules without discussion. My response was that on the other side of that front door was where democracy began. On this side it was a Queendom and that if he wanted part of the democracy he was free to go and pursue it. End of discussion.
Another time (and to this day its his favorite “boy did Mom shut me up moment’)..he was angry with me and yelled as he walked out of the room...I hate YOUUU. I very calmly replied, “Its ok son...I love you enough to ALLOW you to hate me.” It took the wind from his sails and his mouth dropped open. Here he was rebelling and I had the audacity to give him permission. Dang. Again the discussion ended.
Sounds good.
This is why I bought an older 4x4 for my younger son to drive when he gets his DL in a couple of weeks. If he screws up at least I can take the vehicle and use it for fishing trips down at the beach while he hoofs it.
Of course not. Having standards today is being judgmental.
I read all kids emails, texts, and sometimes sit in the room while they talk on the phone. All cell phones must be on loud ringer so I can hear when and how often they ring and if they need to be quieted they are simply turned off ( turned off every night at 10pm and left in living room anyway ).
The computer sit is the kitchen and is not part of our wireless network so it cannot be moved and the screen must always be toward the living area. I am a software engineer so there is no hiding anything.
I spot check my driving age kids’ cars from time to time and have in occasion actually driven to where they said they would be just to let them know I am not one to trifle with.
It does help that I was a state trooper for 12 years and every LEO in 50 miles knows me and my kids.
My kids call me the PIA ( parent intelligence agency ) but have gotten used to it.
Stick to your guns! My five year old (soon to be 6) "gets it", thanks to the example provided by his older siblings. His sister is a junior at UNT, gets good grades, works, and shares an apartment with a sorority sister off-campus. There's still a few differences of opinion, of course, but we're proud of her personal growth and acceptance of personal accountability.
His brother, a freshman at a local CC, offers a stark contrast. We've been trying to find the right button to push for the past ten years, and still haven't found it. I refuse to lump him in with his unmotivated, slovenly peers, and his mother and I constantly have to stay on his rear. His current path will lead him to starting the next school year at New Mexico Military Institute. He's not ready for military service, which I know from 8 years experience.
My youngest son has been doing well in kindergarten, does his "homework", and stays out of mischief. He has shown by his actions that his desired path is similar to his sister's, for which we are extremely thankful. Of course, we affirm his good works, and exhort him to avoid the path his brother has chosen.
My mother used to say, "I'm neither your friend nor your peer."
While it bugged me when she said it, for some strange reason my son heard it a lot from me when he was a kid.
Count us in the bad parent category, too. While our kids were at home, we also checked their email, and required that their computer monitors were completely visible from the doorway to their room.
He’s 19, why doesn’t he do the adult thing and buy his own car?
My Sainted wife and I raised two “head strong” children....
Knowing my past, and much of the sordid history of my childhood and “difficult” years - it was all my wife could do to keep a straight face while I admonished our young ones for committing minor infractions......
I’m sure - that all goodness and positive aspects of our now adult children came from her - not me...
LOL! I remember that one. Hope the kid is doing better.
WOOT! Good for her! EXACTLY what I would do! Precisely. No quarter given when it comes to this, there is just too much at stake.
Not if he’s 19 AND they gave him title.
Good point. (That would be foolish, though ...)
But if he holds the title, his mother couldn't legally sell the car, which probably would have killed the story before we saw it.
Him turning 18 is not a problem if he is living at home. When he turns 18, you don't have to let him live in YOUR HOUSE. I'm guessing that is not going to be a problem since he is probably a respopnsible young man.
I hope the little squirt comes to realize what a fine parent he has in his mom.
He will, about twenty years from now. Hopefully his mom will still be alive for him to thank.
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