That’s garbage. I do things all the time that I don’t want to because I care... that’s a part of marriage. Your definition is the purest form of selfishness. I hate satin underwear, makes me feel gay, but I’ll wear it if it works for my wife. Damn, I hope you don’t give marriage counseling... first rule is that sometimes you do what you don’t want to do for the other person....
I am talking as a dance teacher here! I don’t want anyone to take unless they want to! Unless it’s who they are and what they want.
Otherwise, it’s a total waste of time. It’s too hard for the uncommitted.