i agree, it really isn’t men vs. women, it is PEOPLE, and both parties to a marriage are responsible for making it work. it really is tiresome to have all of these threads devolve into blaming the opposite sex. Each spouse is responsible for holding up their end of the bargain, when one or both fail to do so, it deteriorates. period.
I agree. I think one of the problems with the discussion is the phrase "sharing blame" or "sharing responsibility."
Several people have been discussing the ways that's a deceptive perspective. If a spouse is unfaithful, the blame is his, and the responsibility is his. (Or hers, if the woman is unfaithful.) If the other spouse has been selfish and unloving, that is also wrong, and he or she can be "blamed" for that, but not for the other's choice of infidelity.