If these guys aren’t shot or stabbed or at least clubbed then I would expect the perps to be plural, at least two, though I suppose one could do it if he has hit on some really effective method.
One does not drown with one's arms crossed.
I have seen a photo of the smiley face and it is not the smiley face that you are thinking of.
I know there are are a lot of cynics here, but think about it.
Old Man River is a long long river. There are drunks in every town from MSP to KNEW.
With the college men such a small percentage of the total population, if falling in the river is something all drunks are expected to do, the river would be so full of dead drunks it would impede shipping.
An exaggeration to make a point:
40 to 80 college kids all meeting the same fate, all male and all with the same general description is more than a coincidence.
And the cops who hocked their house must be serious. Why would a retired cop with a pension risk personal ruin unless he really believes there is a serial killer?
If the guy’s that drunk and/ or drugged, it wouldn’t be hard to push him in, I wouldn’t think.