Posted on 06/17/2008 9:51:57 PM PDT by Kaslin
A new video on YouTube is taking the Internet by storm. Entitled "I'm Voting Republican," the satirical clip depicts actors playing conservative Americans of all shapes and sizes explaining why they would vote for the GOP.
"Arnold Jones" says he's voting Republican because "all other countries are inferior to us" -- and his wife, "Trudy Jones," adds, "and we should start as many wars as we need to keep it that way." A soldier in Iraq states that he's voting Republican "so I can stay in Iraq" -- and a young boy, labeled "future draftee," points a fake gun at the camera and smiles while saying "so I can go to Iran!"
A black couple says they're voting Republican because they "like a conservative majority on the Supreme Court," with the wife noting, "we really like knowing that even if we're separate, we'll still be called equal."
This insulting nonsense is precisely what liberals think of conservatives: We're all warmongers, racists, environmental rapists and secret emissaries of big corporations. We're going to reinstitute the draft, start a war with Canada and then relocate African-Americans to Quebec.
This sort of tripe should be dismissed out of hand. In the spirit of evenhandedness and fair play, however, I feel it my duty to explain why I'm going to vote Democrat.
I'm voting Democrat because I believe that the best strategy in war is defeat. It broadens the mind to learn Japanese, German and Arabic. Talk about multiculturalism!
I'm voting Democrat because I'm mad that George W. Bush hasn't caught Bin Laden. That's because Bin Laden is the only Islamic terrorist in the world.
I'm voting Democrat because I believe that if I don't have enough money, the solution is for the government to take more of my money. Who needs money when gas is $5 per gallon?
I'm voting Democrat because I believe that the ideal family is two homosexual bonobos, a goat and a parrot raising a human baby. Love and compassion is all it takes to make a successful family!
I'm voting Democrat because it's my body, and if I want to kill my baby, I'll do it, even if its head is in the birth canal. If I want to cut out my intestines and feed them to the crocodiles, I'll do that too. That's the freedom our forefathers enshrined in the Constitution.
I'm voting Democrat because our enemies on the battlefield deserve comfy hotel rooms, Pay-Per-View, prostitutes and all the benefits of American citizenship.
I'm voting Democrat because I believe we need other countries' permission for me to turn down my thermostat.
I'm voting Democrat because I care about the real victims of crime -- criminals.
I'm voting Democrat because the real cure for racism includes preferential policies based on race -- particularly in presidential voting. If you believe that a black candidate ought to be qualified, as well as black, you're worse than Bull Conner.
I'm voting Democrat because everyone deserves crappy healthcare. Sure, you'll have to wait years for that life-saving cancer surgery. But it's first come, first served at the cemetery!
I'm voting Democrat because I believe in minority rights (except in Muslim countries), free speech (with regard to pornography but not conservative talk radio), environmentalism (unless we're talking about Al Gore's house) and diplomacy (but never backed by the threat of military force).
I'm voting Democrat because I like the words "hope" and "change." Also "kazoo." That's a funny word.
I'm voting Democrat because I believe that America's founders were rich, white, greedy xenophobes, and that America's founding principles are hogwash requiring periodic editing from an unelected group of liberal judges.
Most of all, I'm voting Democrat because I like the ideas they have over in France, but I don't feel like moving there. I'll threaten to move, but I really won't. After all, I have a good job, healthcare, lower taxes, free speech and a social framework that promotes family structure. And all of it is defended by the most effective fighting force on the planet.
If only the institution of far-left values resulted in a great country. Oh, well. That won't stop me from voting Democrat, though. After all, I'm voting Democrat because thought isn't one of my strong suits.
This is classic!!!
Bump for later
This is a keeper.
ROTFL!!!!!
I like. And “kazoo” is a funny word, much like Obongo, Obama’s brother’s name.
I think this will be included in emails to all my friends. Right on the mark!
LMAO! This guy rocks!
Did he leave anything out?
This isn’t a fair comparison. The fake Republican commercial was based on misconceptions of conservatism. Shapiro’s column was based on true facts about liberalism.
Yup.
Only glamor and glitter matter to such fools.
Substance and experience could matter less.
bookmark!
bump for tomorrow and for this going youtube
So why doesn’t someone make up a You Tube Video like the “I’m Voting Republican” one. After all, it is a lot easier for liberals to watch You Tube than to take the time out of their busy schedules to R E A D.
Most of the uninformed, dummy electorate will listen to this with half of one ear and think that it really is a GOP ad.
I guess the ignorance of the average American voter is a plus for us this time.
I hope they show this film everywhere. I hope everyone sees it. It’ll change nothing in the blue states, and it’ll fire red state voters up. Same with that MoveOn “you can’t have my baby!” work of hysteria.
These leftists think they’re being slick, and they’re only aiming the gun for their own foot.
I would do it but I have a LOT of skeletons in my closet. Otherwise, I can pass for a PERFECT Democrat voter. If this video got out of me, I would be eaten alive by the MSM.
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