Posted on 12/10/2009 6:28:37 AM PST by C19fan
Ditto on Jane. Hubba hubba.
The lady has aged quite well.
I’m hoping they soon launch “sugardaddy” cruises, myself......
Ah, the lovely Mrs. Lawson, brainy, beautiful and bodacious. I’ve heard she can cook too!
My “alternate free pass” is Helen Mirren!
Great minds!
Ever since that scene in “The Cook, the Thief, his Wife and her Lover”....
But if you will not take this Counsel, and persist in thinking a Commerce with the Sex inevitable, then I repeat my former Advice, that in all your Amours you should prefer old Women to young ones. You call this a Paradox, and demand my Reasons. They are these:
1. Because as they have more Knowledge of the World and their Minds are better stor'd with Observations, their Conversation is more improving and more lastingly agreable.
2. Because when Women cease to be handsome, they study to be good. To maintain their Influence over Men, they supply the Dimunition of Beauty by the Augmentation of Utility. They learn to do 1000 Services small and great, and are the most tender and useful of all Friends when you are sick. Thus they continue amiable. And hence there is hardly such thing to be found as an old Woman who is not a good Woman.
3. Because there is no hazard of Children, which irregularly produc'd may be attended with much Inconvenience.
4. Because thro' more Experience, they are more prudent and discreet in conducting and Intrigue to prevent Suspicion. The Commerce with them is therefore safer with regard to your Reputation. And with regard to theirs, if the Affair should happen to be known, considerate People might be rather inclin'd to excuse an old Woman who would kindly take care of a young Man, form his Manners by her good Counsels, and prevent his ruining his Health and Fortune among mercenary Prostitutes.
5. Because in every animal that walks upright, the Deficiency of the Fluids that fill the Muscles appears first in the highest Part: the Face first grows lank and wrinkled; then the Neck; then the Breast and Arms; the lower Parts continuing to the last as plump as ever: So that covering all above with a Basket, and regarding only what is below the Girdle, it is impossible of two Women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all Cats are grey, the Pleasure of corporal Enjoyment with an Old Woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every Knack being by Practice capable of Improvement.
6. Because the Sin is less. The debauching of a Virgin may be her Ruin, and make her for Life unhappy.
7. Because the Compunction is less. The having made a young Girl miserable may give you frequent bitter Reflections; none of which can attend the making an old Woman happy.
8. They are so grateful!!
Jonathan Swift
She ain’t a cougar. More like a fossilized Sabertooth.
Can you imagine the furor if there was a cruise specifically set up for old fogey men trying to land a hottie in their 20s or 30s? Whew, we’d never hear the end of it.
Looks like her flotation device is deployed.
Hmmm - seems like the cougars ain’t looking to feast on beer gut. My plan, years in the making, is foiled.
“...of course, to be cougar bait, a 30 to 40 yr old guy would have to be hunted by a 50 to 60 yr old cougar. Not that there aren’t some great ones in that category, mind you...”
Of course, to carry the analogy out further, where does that leave the 55-year old guys?
S.O.L.!!!!!
Hubbala!!!!!
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