I’m starting to worry already about creating a spoiled brat in my daughter. She’s only 18 months old but I’m already trying to think of ways to teach her the difference between needs and wants. Wants primarily being what you get by earning them.
Don’t worry overmuch about spoiling her at this age. At the moment, just let her be a kid. If you want to teach her the difference, use positive reinforcement. Try teaching her how to cook small stuff as she gets older. If you have an oven with a transparent door, let her watch the muffins bake and rise. It’ll be endlessly fascinating.
Teach her the rewards of having earned something herself. I can tell you that if you teach her to feel great satisfaction after accomplishing something herself and praise her for being self sufficient in the small things, you’ll instill an instinctive sense of accomplishment when she takes initiative in the larger things in life. Then later on you’ll have a little girl who won’t THINK of doing the stuff that other tarts these days do. a
She’ll learn self respect and self confidence, not self esteem.
Basically, anything you might consider giving for Christmas or a birthday is a “want,” because all genuine needs of a young child - food, clothing, shelter, diapers - should be met at the time the need emerges.
My youngest is 17 months old, and I don’t think he’s capable of recognizing that he’s been given a present at this age. He plays with everything in the house, anyway, no matter whose it is. Your daughter might like a ream of paper and a box of crayons, if she doesn’t eat crayons (my son does). My older byos (4, 6, 8) love getting 500 sheets to draw on.
I think the key is moderation. Do unto others what you would have done unto you. In other words, what would have been to best thing to do raising you?
Keep an emphasis on the Christmas story, do some kindnesses for others, and keep up traditions like cookie baking (take some to the firehouse!), decorating with stories attached to decorations (Grandma’s stocking, the ornament Daddy brought back from overseas, etc.), and sing Christmas carols for sure. Go Christmas caroling!
Read good Christmas-oriented stories, and skip the majority of the movies that have the one theme of “saving Christmas.” Little Drummer Boy is good; so is It’s a Wonderful Life.