In anticipation of the repeal of Dont Ask, Dont Tell, in 2007, the Pentagon prepared a list of new or reinterpreted nomenclature and practices familiar to many older veterans. The gay EM who supplied Wikileaks sent us a copy just before his arrest. Some of the more interesting items are below.
All marching commands ending in March will now end in either MINCE or SWISH, at the option of the individual issuing the command;
The command Right dress right, will be replaced with Right strapless evening gown, allrighty;
Due to the distinct possibility that it may be misinterpreted, the command To the Rear March will be replaced with OK, Fellas, Turn Around;
Marching cadences employing Jodie will now replace that archaic appellation with the more metro-sexually appropriate Brucie:
The humorous but now out-dated phrase Drop your c**ks and grab your socks is to be replaced with Drop your c**ks and grab the fellas over there;
A Junk on the bunk inspection will now allow a soldiers junk to actually be displayed on his bunk;
If it will not interfere with his duties, a Latrine Queen may wear a pair of high heel pumps if they are OD in color;
The rank of Private will be replaced with Newby.
For those still smoking, as it could lead to serious unit cohesion break-down, the phrase Field strip that butt will no longer be used.
As we did deeper into the documents we were provided, we will add other changes.
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