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(Yeah, you be sure you convey to all your future dates that they are comparable to a car test drive & that you continue to plan to test a lot of vehicles before you "traffick" in one particular vehicle that you'll buy like property...great winsomeness...and if you're still single...well, we understand why)

I celebrate my 20th wedding anniversary on June 21, 2011.

(Gee. Why stop @ hundreds...? Why not follow the "LA Laker 'test drive' plan?") First you could follow the "Wilt Chamberlain Plan" & sleep with literally thousands... But, of course, you can't always tell a "lemon" by the mere surface qualities that you seem to seek... So just a reminder that the "Magic Johnson plan" isn't always so "magical"... You might be "testing" a lemon with a freeway drive only to have her stall on you in the middle of the commuter lane in LA...

My wife's parents got hitched on the "buy it on faith" plan of sexual compatibility. Her "sex" talk from Mom, the earnest virgin on her own wedding night? "Dear, sex is just one of those messy little chores you have to do once in awhile--there's no getting out of it."

I am so glad my girlfriend, and eventual wife, had sought to find out for herself that by contrast her parents' love life had all of the appeal of a life sentence of rolling in a pile of manure.

Would anyone really be surprised to hear that after 25 or so years of "messy little chores," apparently performed with the implied singular lack of enthusiasm, (and for all I know, maybe his technique is lacking in its own right), that my f-i-l had an ill-considered affair with a more "sexually exciting" woman? Kids were no longer the glue there--just time in service--and it melted away fast with certain facets of the remnant relationship being long suboptimal.

I would, and did, face the personal perils of pre-marital "fornication," with my eventual wife, and I'd do it again were I to have a second go around. Sexual naivete, dissatisfaction, and the rut of total repression is a hell on earth of a person's own making or of one's sexually incompatible partner. Too many people have only too late experienced the let down of bad sexual chemistry founded upon a false premise that "things will work themselves out" ONLY AFTER they've eternally contracted with and bought their pig in a poke--or cheating would never be heard of, especially in the gossip before and after services every weekend.

To act as if premarital chastity is some sort of panacea to "stepping out" is to totally ignore the ineffective outcomes that one encounters.

ALL: Count how many worldview presumptions Goldsborough makes in these statements:

Sexual naivete, dissatisfaction, and the rut of total repression is a hell on earth of a person's own making or of one's sexually incompatible partner. Too many people have only too late experienced the let down of bad sexual chemistry founded upon a false premise that "things will work themselves out" ONLY AFTER they've eternally contracted with and bought their pig in a poke--or cheating would never be heard of, especially in the gossip before and after services every weekend.

#1 - Goldsborough presumes that pre-marital satisfaction -- say pre-marital "satisfaction" of a couple in their 20s somehow = lifelong marital "satisfaction"...

(Hmm...I wonder how many couples in their 30s, 40s, 50s, etc. would like to talk to you about that bankrupt notion)

#2 - What are the sexual ailments Goldsborough Ids there:
(a) "Sexual 'naivete'"-- which itself is a thoroughly subjective phrase because it can range from...
...a woman "failing" to major in Hollywood porn 101 or Nevada Brothels 201...
...to a woman who simply dislikes treating sexuality as an "artform" [in the movie, the 10 Commandments, the character playing Moses' wife makes a statement about Jewish wives who aren't like Egyptian wives that treat set as an art...]
(b) "Sexual dissatisfaction"
(c) "rut of total repression"
(d) "bad sexual chemistry"

Seems to me Goldsborough is saying there that if a person grades their spouse as having a...
..."D" in chemistry...
...an audit "no grade" in repression...
...a "D" or "F" in that moving tartet of "satisfaction"
...or a "repeat the grade level" in naivete'...
...why who is really then to "blame" for "cheating" (as he said "or cheating would never be heard of".

Perhaps you should open up a Cheating Licensing School where you could issue licences to cheaters. Why it'd probably alleviate some of the guilt.

I'd suggest for you pre-license courses like "Partner Blame 101"

(I think if you talked to enough marriage counselors they'd tell you the majority of their cases involves a double problem -- and the problem extends well beyond the bedroom...)