Now that the location of AF447 is known, why not have a memorial service for them and let the remains stay where they are? There is nothing to be gained from mounting (or even considering) a recovery operation . . . no matter how well-intentioned.
I don’t know. If my loved one was among those lost in the flight, I would probably want the remains to be brought home. But, if I were told that recovery was just too difficult, I would probably reconcile myself to the fact.
Although I agree with you, I consider it merciful to allow each family to make that decision for themselves, or even to express an opinion.
If you haven't experienced a family death in an accident, you have no idea. It's not a cold, rational process.