Stop Panicking About Bullies

Wall Street Journal ^ | 3/30/12 | NICK GILLESPIE

[jimbo123]

Childhood is safer than ever before, but today's parents need to worry about something. Nick Gillespie on why busybodies and bureaucrats have zeroed in on bullying.

"When I was younger," a remarkably self-assured, soft-spoken 15-year-old kid named Aaron tells the camera, "I suffered from bullying because of my lips—as you can see, they're kind of unusually large. So I would kind of get [called] 'Fish Lips'—things like that a lot—and my glasses too, I got those at an early age. That contributed. And the fact that my last name is Cheese didn't really help with the matter either. I would get [called] 'Cheeseburger,' 'Cheese Guy'—things like that, that weren't really very flattering. Just kind of making fun of my name—I'm a pretty sensitive kid, so I would have to fight back the tears when I was being called names."

[Mercat]

I started wearing glasses in second grade. My last name was a synonym for cranky. I had freckles. I moved four times during grade school. Now I’m a trial lawyer and a really good one. I probably wouldn’t have had the back bone to be one if I had been one of the popular kids. Did I mention that my favorite Harry Potter character is Luna Lovegood?

[BrewingFrog]

I have always thought that the upswing in “bullying” is due to the fact that through imbecile sero-tolerance rules, if a kid fights back against a bully, he is considered as guilty as the bully, and suffers accordingly.

This is deranged, as bullies are generally not the kind who are going to excel in life and the kids they bully generally are. Bullies therefore have nothing to lose in being suspended.

I remember back in the old, uncivilized days, when the unruly kids were marched down to the PE Coaches office, and paddled silly. No kid wanted that and it was an excellent deterrent. But, as a geek who was picked on, it was fully worth it to pop a bully in the mouth and then watch him get it far harder from the coach than I did. They knew who was the instigator and who was the victim, and meted out punishment accordingly.

Now there is no recourse. No ability to fight back. It’s like.. ‘rats run things or something...

[ClearCase_guy]

The big problem with bullying today is that the victims have a good chance of being victimized by the school. The bully picks on a kid, and picks and picks and picks. No downside for the bully -- it's just fun. Then the victim strikes back at the bully and the school comes down on the victim like a ton of bricks.

That encourages bullies and discourages kids today from finding the backbone to deal with the problem the way it should be dealt with.

[humblegunner]

I was sort of a bully in school.

Changed schools, wound up getting bullied myself.

I never thought either circumstance was the end of the world.

And here I am today, humanity’s greatest hope and the very model of reason and compassion.

[Vendome]

Fish lips?

Looks more like thin lips or lisp.

[Vendome]

I grew up as the number one child of 6. Living with your competitors for 18 years gives you ample opportunity to stand your ground and give as good as you get.

I had my share of fights in school but I think mostly due to people misjudged that I would cower or back down.

Never did. Not genetically disposed for it and they paid for their dumb decision.

Last guy that tried it was 6 years ago. After punching square in the nose and lips I had a violent, allergic reaction.

He lost two teeth and had to go to some specialist to save them.

He’s been rather passive since then, after years of misjudged my tolerance for idiotic attempts to lord himself over me.

I think he thought he got something in his head to finally best me at something , anything and with the courage of a few drinks in him he nailed me clear out of the blue.

He’ll never make that mistake again.

[PastorBooks]

“Childhood is safer than ever before, but...”

Safer??? Oh, really? Let’s see, we butcher millions in the womb, so the danger starts at conception.

Then we put the little ones in DAY CARE.

Then when they are old enough to thrust into kindergarten (and get rid of them for the day), we turn them over to ATHEISTIC BRAINWASHING.

Then they “graduate” (utterly uneducated)... and they despise their parents.

Doesn’t sound very “safe” to me.

[TankerKC]

And here I am today, humanity’s greatest hope and the very model of reason and compassion.

I have no reason not to believe that is true.

Just one thing...how did you get humblegunner's password? :)

[OwenKellogg]

And here I am today, humanity’s greatest hope and the very model of reason and compassion.

------------------------------

Seriously, you ought to start a blog.

[OldBullrider]

I was bullied, once, the other kid was just trying to see if I would back down. New in the school even though I had lived in the area 5 years earlier. I am not big nor do I consider myself to be a tough guy, but I don’t back down from anyone, if I have done nothing wrong. I remember some kids that were made fun of because they were poorer than others, shoot even my family would have been considered below the poverty line. But the bullying never got to a point to where a kid would have considered suicide. Another kid would eventually stand up with the bullied one and say enough is enough, now the bully had two to contend with. That is what I remember. Also my mom told me if someone starts a fight with you, you have my permission to finish it. My mother is a devout Christian woman, both mom and dad have been married almost 70 years, dad is a preacher. So yeah I had to deal with that too, when I was in school.

[Leaning Right]

Good post.

But I have one comment to make. It's about the victim fighting back. When I was an inner-city high school teacher, I saw a few instances of the victim fighting back. In every case, the bully won. Remember, the bully has thug friends ready to jump in - and later retaliate - the victim does not.

The idea of the victim hitting the bully and making him cry happens so rarely it can be considered just TV fantasy.

Bullies make their victims' lives continuous misery. Very little upside there.

So what's the solution? It's as you said, a visit to the PE coach's office. That's one fight the bully will ALWAYS lose.

[Keith in Iowa]

>>>And here I am today, humanity’s greatest hope and the very model of reason and compassion.

what a lie.

[Nitehawk0325]

When I was a kid, I was a big kid. Every coach wanted me to play for their team. I had no interest in playing sports. I had chores that needed to be done (I worked on the family dairy) and then I had homework. I had no time for such nonsense games as football or basketball. But this didn't seem to stop the coaches from telling their players to ‘convince’ me to play. I was jumped and beat up a number of times in high school. Finally, in senior year, I cracked. When the football team decided it was time to give me an attitude adjustment, I surprised them by protecting myself. Out of the 8 jumpers, I laid out 6 and send one to the hospital with a broken jaw and various other broken bones.
What happened, I got suspended and nothing happened to the football players. But that three day suspension was well worth it. No one ever bother me again. As a matter of fact, they have me extra space when passing me in the hallways.
I was neither a geek or a jock. I just wanted to be left alone. As far as all these new rules for bullies, it's not going to work. The people who think up all these rules are probably the kids, 20 years later, who were bullied.
Finally, most the bullies I dealt with in school, are losers to this day. Most the kids being bullied are the kids who graduated college with degrees and now are making the big bucks. Even a few are the people who drive all of us crazy by inventing one after another of the viruses that infect our computers. This getting back at all the bullies in their past.
Democrats need to just stay the hell out of lives and let the natural progressive happen. Just my humble opinion.

[FourPeas]

Bullying is more of a problem today only in that today's current crop of bullies live in a country where human life has little to no value.

[Fast Moving Angel]

Um ... April Fool’s Day is tomorrow ;-)

[Mr. Jeeves]

This is deranged, as bullies are generally not the kind who are going to excel in life and the kids they bully generally are.

My observation is that bullies generally grow up to be labor leaders, Democrat politicians, and CEO's. Sociopaths, in other words. Refusal to let the good kids hit back since the 70's has led directly to a lot of societal dysfunction.

[YankeeReb]

Didn’t B. Hussein 0bama appoint Kevin Jennings as our “safe school tsar” as one of his first acts to fundamentally transform America? I understand Jennings even had the full support of NAMBLA, so what’s he been doing about the “bullying crisis”?

[humblegunner]

what a lie.

No, it really is today.

Is it some other day in Iowa?

[eater-of-toast]

Paddling served as a pretty good deterrent in the schools I attended, as well. There were exceptions... for some reason in my 8th grade algebra class there was a cadre of boys who asked the teacher for cracks from time to time, just to posture as hard cases. The teacher was happy to oblige and delivered the cracks to order, giving takers the choice of “Whoppers” (hard cracks) or “Winky Burgers” (light ones). Strange kids, strange teacher...