of the first order... of the first order...“asswhole”: def. see JESSE JAMES
You got that right! Sandra isn’t allowed to attend mens’ funerals: Dead man sit up in their coffins and wolf-whistle.
Something similar actually happened in a little church in western Oklahoma. The church was pretty much one large room, the full-Monty baptismal up front with a pastoral scene, blue sky, clouds, a river. Song numbers on a plaque on the right front wall, the amount coughed up into the plates the previous week. The preacher must have thought it important that the congregation be made aware of that fact.
One double door entrance and a side entrance/exit door. Plain glass windows on the sides, no air conditioning. Wooden floors. No-nonsense oak pews that put your butt to sleep.
The guest of honor had some sort of problem with his stomach muscles we learned later. It was an open casket and during the whaddya call it—when someone comes up with some nice things to say about the deceased—the body slowly sat up behind the preacher.
Several people jumped out the windows. In a town that small it was something to talk about, for years.