:~D
Posted on 08/23/2012 8:57:00 AM PDT by Kartographer
:~D
Many’s the day when me and my horse Old Crayon would drive the Spamalopes to market in Old Toadsuck, Arkansas.
A lot of these people would never consider eating on the cheap just a few years ago.
Just a few months ago a girl I went to HS with in the early 70’s ripped her flowers out to plant veggies.
Until this year she had never grown a veggie in her life.
Her husband suddenly took up hunting last year.
Until Zippo they were solid middle class and about as far to the left as you could get.
Not any more.
Seeing people buying food with their Lone Star card that she can't afford to buy has sent her over the edge.
Can’t do a garden, we’re renting. We make a 10lb sack of taters and a bag of rice go a long way, but there’s a limit to everything. I once bought a Mercedes with cash and now I hope & pray to have enough to pay the rent. Someone explain that to me.
I’m not really a prepper but I have enough Spam, PorknBeans and other stuff I could easily go a couple months. I do have to remember to restock continually though.
You are a prepper, you just don’t know it.
Preppers com in all shapes and sizes just like any group of people, most don’t even agree on what they are prepping for, but all of them agree on a fews things one the best hand up you can get is one you give yourself. All of them refuse to be a prop in the backdrop money shot for some news achor showing them standing on a bridge waiting for FEMA to bring them a bottle of water, an MRE and a warm banket.
Most feel like me that you either prepare to stand on your own beholden to no one or you end up becoming dependent on others to provide your basic needs and become thier‘serf’.
Me I don’t want to be beholden to anyone for providing what is needed for me and mine. I certainly don’t want to have to kiss some ‘gubberment’ third class bureaucratic butt to try and coax some help from them, I don’t want some ‘jack booted’ thug herding me in line and telling me where to stand, sit, eat or sleep.
And last but not least I don’t want to be shut up in with a bunch of ‘zombies’ and have to worry about not only trying to get basic necessities but having to fight to keep what I manage to get.
That’s what the heart of prepping is all about.
Sad fact is another 4 years of leftist in power and everyone will be looking back at this time as the “good times”.
If there isn’t a drastic change and a reduction in govt spending and a reduction in the number of people on the govt dole, it’s all going to come crashing down around us.
Spam Haikus (For those who are rusty, haiku is an unrhymed Japanese lyric poem fixed three lines consisting of 5,7, and 5 syllables respectively.)
1.
Blue can of steel
What promise do you hold?
Salt flesh so ripe
2.
Can of metal, slick
Soft center, so cool, moistening
I yearn for your salt
3.
Twist, pull the sharp lid
Jerks and cuts me deeply but
Spam, aah, my poultice
4.
Silent, former pig
One communal awareness
Myriad pink bricks
5. Clad in metal, proud
No mere salt-curing for you
You are not bacon
6.
And who dares mock Spam?
You? You? You are not worthy
Of one rich pink fleck.
7.
Like some spongy rock
A granite, my piece of Spam
In sunlight on my plate.
8.
Little slab of meat
In a wash of clear jelly
Now I heat the pan
9. Oh tin of pink meat
I ponder what you may be:
Snout or ear or feet?
10.
In the cool morning
I fry up a slab of Spam
A dog barks next door
11.
Pink tender morsel
Glistening with salty gel
What the hell is it?
12.
Ears, snouts and innards
A homogeneous mass
Pass another slice
13.
Old man seeks doctor
“I eat Spam daily,” he says.
Angioplasty
14.
Highly unnatural
The tortured shape of this “food”
A small pink coffin
15.
Pink beefy temptress
I can no longer remain
Vegetarian
God love ya! Hilarious!
Back in the Carter years I thought the end of the world was coming and stocked up on TONS of Spam.
Years later we “boxed the Union” - Oceanside, CA to Alberta, East to NY, South to Orlando, FL, then back home to CA. Using up the cans, we ate Spam at least twice a day until the kids started crying when they saw the can come out.
To this day my oldest boy HATES the stuff, so naturally we sent him a Spam postcard from their factory and will now forward him your Haiku.
Life is good.
Those poems made me cry. “You are not bacon”......more tears.....
You could get these published in the Atlantic......with a few changes. First, change spam to a deer. Then, mention any excretory process. Viola! You’re published in the atlantic.
Pink beefy temptress
I can no longer remain
Vegetarian
Beefy? I don’t think they can afford to drop cows into those cans.
try:
Pink porcine temptress
Oh—I actually got those in an email from a friend, I didn’t write them. Wish I had, though. I agree, porcine would have been better. :)
I confess I did not write those, I got them in an email a while ago.
My family was in tears by the end of it.
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