WHERE's MULLAH OMAR?
Posted on 10/15/2012 7:23:48 AM PDT by SeekAndFind
Afghan insurgent leaders keep trying not to think about it. “At the moment, questions of Mullah Omar’s health and whereabouts are not so important,” a member of the Taliban’s ruling council, the Quetta Shura, tells Newsweek. “The focus should be on jihad and resistance.” But the fighters can’t help wondering and worrying—especially around this time of year. They’re fast approaching yet another anniversary of the day their supreme leader, Mullah Mohammed Omar, vanished into the mountains outside the city of Kandahar. He was perched on the back of a motorcycle driven by his brother-in-law and right-hand man, Mullah Abdul Ghani Baradar, getting away as the U.S.-led invasion force and its Northern Alliance partners closed in. Senior and former Taliban officials say there has not been one confirmed sighting of their Amir-ul-Momineen—“commander of the faithful”—in the 11 years since.
Many past and present Taliban officials privately fear the worst. Omar could be dead or otherwise incapacitated, they suspect, or secretly imprisoned by Pakistan’s all-powerful Directorate for Inter-Services Intelligence. Something must be preventing him from contacting them. Otherwise he could at least send them a recording of his voice—perhaps offering his condolences for the thousands of Afghans who have died fighting the Americans, suggests a former senior official who has left the Taliban. A former aide to Omar echoes the thought: “If Mullah Omar were in good condition he would send proof that he’s alive.” After all, the former aide argues, there’s a $25 million bounty on al Qaeda’s Ayman al-Zawahiri, and he still issues regular messages. “Why not Mullah Omar?”
It’s true that once or twice a year, written holiday greetings are sent out in Omar’s name. People who knew him just shake their heads over the messages, which they dismiss as blatant forgeries. Mullah Omar never wrote such fancy language, they say—he was a simple country preacher, without the education even to read or recite the words attributed to him, never mind actually compose them. The former senior official recalls the way Omar used to stumble over his native tongue in the interviews he occasionally gave the BBC Pashto service when the Taliban were in power. As the shura member remarks, the Taliban’s propaganda chief liked to have Mullah Omar’s name on every communiqué—“to make it more authentic and reliable.” (No one was willing to be quoted by name for this story.)
Omar’s long silence continues to sow confusion in the Taliban ranks. “I have not met Mullah Omar since 2001, and I would not insist on seeing him,” says the shura member. “But as a human being, I have questions about orders and actions that have been issued in his name.”
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Who ever said he was sane?
“Aye-aye!”
It’s gotta be said:
“I’ve got my eye out for Mullah Omar!”
Paging Mullah Omar
Maybe his skirt got caught in the drive chain ...
I prefer to believe he was given a million $$ and is living the good life in a Paris suburb free of the constant problems and perils of life.
Well, he swung from the tree and he lit on the ground
He started to rock really rockin’ around
It was a crazy ditty with a swinging tune
Wop bop a lula wop bam boom
One-eyed one-horned flying people eater
Ooh, it sure looks strange to me!
Omar was known for sitting in his suv and going “frrrr” spitting all over the windscreen, playing driver.
He never had a mind.
Or his head scarf.....
Maybe he had an "Isadora Duncan" episode.
Omar is probably fossilized worm poop.
“Paging Mullah Omar”
Paging Mullah Fubar!
Yes! he’s lost his mind and is hiding out in the mountains roasting pig on a skewer and throwin’ back some Coronas with naked pole dancers.
I think he’s working in the White House Situation Room, where they bring him his meals.
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