Peace, of course.
Petraeus did use his wife, so when it benefited him he could say he was a family man with a 37 year marriage. He came into the military at a time when you couldn’t get divorced and get ahead. If he was going to do this, he should have gotten divorced. But apparently he thought he could have his cake and eat it too.
Perhaps you are a military wife, but for those who aren’t familiar with them, military wives can’t readily have major careers because of all the moves, so most are dependent on these guys. At Petraeus’ level, there is a lot of pay, benefits and prestige at stake. Maybe his wife felt she had no choice, so she went along, but it has taken a toll on her. She surprises me, because many officers’ wives I know, with husbands at much lower ranks, are similarly competitive to their husbands and do not let themselves go. Sure, we’d all like to believe that people are not that superficial, and that Petraeus would honor his wife for the sacrifices she has made on his behalf. But it is a very real discussion amongst these wives that they have competitive, athletic husbands, who work with women like Paula Broadwell. They do not want to make it easy for somebody like Broadwell to get their hooks in.
I agree with what you just said, at my age I didn't just fall off the turnip truck.
These things go on all the time. Put a piece of "available" asp near one of them, they can't stop themselves. Petraeus found that piece of "available asp", so conveniently placed/planted at his disposal.
My only point is no matter what the wife looks like, (and frankly I will never understand why wives let themselves go, lonliness I think is the biggest problem) but nevertheless, the "good" wife is NEVER to blame, and I did say "GOOD WIFE", not tramp wife.
By her appearance I have to think she was a "good, loyal" wife and mother. jmo
I don’t understand? How did she let herself go? She’s old, like her husband. She looks her age. Yes, she can’t compete with some younger woman, but then, she isn’t one.
Are you saying she’s too fat?
Her hairstyle can be glamored up?
She could get plastic surgery? Botox shots? Nancy Pelosi’s private surgeon?
Please explain...
Without his wife’s military connections I doubt his career would have been what it was, her connections got him in very good with the right people in the beginning. Look up her dad, General William Allen Knowlton. Petraeus married very well for his career, may have married her for that reason.
I know this is not my discussion, so please forgive me for interrupting.
At first I couldn’t believe you called Holly Petraeus dowdy - she is a fantastic supporter of military families and as a military spouse (fairly recently retired) I am pretty crazy about her.
I think that Gen. Petraeus’ marrying her was very fortunate to his career, considering her family background. She would also know “everything” about how to navigate and automatically have a ‘foot in the door’ in places that others might be quite envious of.
But this post, I agree completely. You are right. I have two stereotypes, based on my personal observations for senior officer spouses (though I feel many fall somewhere in between the extremes).
One stereotype is as you describe: competitive, keeping themselves up, as you say. There have been women I knew who took that to an extreme. One base where we lived, I walked into the first social and thought “why are all these 40 something women dressing in their daughter’s clothes....I had been taking good care of myself and dressed nicely - I thought - but I had a sense of junior high throwback at this assignment, and I felt very dowdy in what I thought was my understated, elegant look. haha.
The other stereotype is more like Mrs. Petraeus, where her vision is on her own kind of mission by supporting her husband’s career, by being very active in the military family community.. supporting military families, taking on their issues and so on. If that makes sense. They don’t see the physical maintenance as very important, aside from trying to “stay healthy”... and perhaps even shirk it a little as being vain and a waste of time.
She is 60 years old, and I think she looks beautiful and caring in a matronly way. When is it going to be okay to look matronly, if not at 60? But still...
You are absolutely right that people are superficial. I just hate thinking that that’s what it boils down to.