"Welcome to Costco. I love you...welcome to Costco, I love you...welcome to Costco, I love you..."
Of course, with Windows 8 coming out (who can miss the advertising, even if you don't watch television) this is what came to mind for me:
Come to think of it, we already almost have an "Ow! My Balls!" channel. Actually, a few of them...ABC...NBC...CBS...